


Dealbreaker

by MagentasNightmare



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Both like the same woman:(, Brotherly Affection, Brotherly Angst, Brotherly Love, Conflict of the heart, DON'T LIKE - DON'T READ (I'm not changing what I write for anyone:), F/M, GRAMMARLY EDITED - Freeform, Heartbreak, Insecurity, Merle is a fluff monster, New love, Self-Sacrifice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-16
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-06-02 12:23:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 30,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6566077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagentasNightmare/pseuds/MagentasNightmare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Daryl and Merle's past influences their present day relationship and the way they navigate decisions with women. They run a  business together and feel the affects of their bond interfering with either of them moving forward in life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, my babies!  
> Ok, so this chapter opens the story for the purpose of explaining the relationship dynamic between Daryl and Merle based on their childhood experiences. Those negative experiences influence heavily the way they interact in the present day (everything after this chapter is present day) and will inform why they make some of the decisions they do and why they are so closely bonded.  
> It's a little triggery, just FYI (childhood abuse). I hope you enjoy this story and thank you for continuing to read my work and for being so supportive of my craziness.  
> Love, Teagan XOXO

_ **Dealbreaker 1** _

 

You could almost see your breath in the house that day. Edgar was convinced all you needed was the fireplace; it was adequate in his day.

Merle could feel the tension rising over the course of the week, and he knew it was coming, that Saturday was marked for trouble. There would be a catalyst, there always was, but it didn't even have to be a good one.

Something would trigger it all, and he would feel the wind change direction but little Daryl would not. He was still so innocent and, at only six, he fell for the lies that Merle no longer did.

_*If you didn't piss me off it wouldn't happen!_

_*Come on, boy. All dad's get pissed off._

Their father wasn't the one who usually bothered telling a bunch of lies; it was normally their mother.

_*He doesn't mean it._

_*Just stay out of his way when he's like this, and it'll be fine._

_*Don't tell anyone at school or they'll take you to the orphanage and beat you senseless. It's even worse there._

_*I'll talk to him, it'll get better._

Merle was eleven, and he knew better, his instincts were already sharp. Sometimes he'd imagine himself as a little brown rabbit in a field of fresh, white snow and sometimes a white rabbit on the open prairie. Not matter what the situation he had the wrong colored fur but he was fast, and he could smell danger.

He was already fairly numb to being hit; he could go somewhere in his mind that was safe. The place he'd go to was full of great music, pretty girls, and nice cars. He could shut it down when Edgar got pissed and grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt.

There was a rhythm to the abuse, and he knew it by heart which made it easier somehow. Merle already knew the world wasn't all about gentle pats on the head, comforting words and having your basic needs met. He knew the world was a cold place for kids like him and Daryl and that was just reality. The rhythm of abuse was their world.

First, there would be yelling and accusations of various kinds.

“Were you into my smokes, boy?”

(Merle didn't touch a cigarette till he was 16.)

“No, Dad.”

“Where are they then?”

“I don't know. I'll look.”

(Best to look like you were trying to help.)

A minute or so would pass, and then he'd catch it around the back of his head. It was always a surprise shot, and it would make his eyes water. Daryl would be standing there with his little doe eyes just staring at him.

“Go and play in our room, Daryl,” he'd warn. Often, Daryl wouldn't listen, and he'd just stay standing there.

“Not finding 'em, hey? Stay the fuck outta my stuff!”

“Yes, Sir.”

(There was no point in saying you didn't touch them.)

“Go get me some more from the shop, ya thieving piece of shit!”

Merle would walk to the store after putting Daryl in his room with some comic books. It did no good to dawdle cause he'd be waiting by the door, still as angry as hell when he returned.

Edgar had just run out of smokes, that's all it was but he had to blame someone, and it was almost always Merle.

He'd get back with the smokes and catch a few swats, and by now he didn't cry. In the beginning, Merle would wail and sob thinking he'd take pity but Edgar seemed to like it even more. The beatings only died down in frequency when he stopped crying cause it was less fun to beat someone who wasn't objecting.

The only problem with not crying was that he kept the pain inside and it killed him a little more every day. What really scared Merle was that Daryl would cry and Edgar knew it. When he was really pissed off he'd go after Daryl, and that's when Merle stepped up and would redirect the abuse to himself, he could take it.

Merle was trying to teach Daryl all he could about how to keep clear, but Daryl was six and teaching a six-year-old not to cry when they're beaten was pointless.

There were two hours every day when he was home from school with Daryl and Edgar was still at work and these hours were the best in the day. He'd play one of the few records they owned and turn it up loud. All they ever had was old music, nothing new. Daryl would dance like a lunatic and get to be a kid for a little while as he'd sit and read a magazine and watch him acting the fool. Seeing Daryl laughing and goofing off was the best part of his day, those memories were his favorite.

Daryl liked _The Hollies_ best and always wanted to hear Bus Stop over and over and over.

 

 ** _Bus stop, wet day, she's there, I say_**  
 **_Please share my umbrella_**  
 **_Bus stop, bus goes, she stays, love grows_**  
 **_Under my umbrella_**  
  
**_All that summer we enjoyed it_**  
 **_Wind and rain and shine_**  
 **_That umbrella, we employed it_**  
 **_By August, she was mine_**

Daryl spent years convinced that you could find a pretty girlfriend at the bus stop with just an umbrella.

Their mom walked around like a phantom in their home and never engaged either of them very much, they had each other, and that's all they needed.

Back to that particular Saturday, Merle had felt it brewing, and it was a day where Edgar had nothing to stop him losing it. They were poor as fuck after Christmas, and Edgar only had drinking on the docket for the day. There was always just enough money for booze but not always bills or food.

He'd been fighting with their mother about everything under the sun and Daryl was sick with some kind of stomach bug. Merle told him to keep his ass in the bedroom and not make a mess.

When he wasn't at the supper table Edgar asked about the change of order; he was all about order.

“Where's your brother?”

“In bed, he's sick.”

“Get him out here.”

“He's throwing up, Sir.”

“Get him out here!”

Merle collected Daryl and sat him at the table, and he knew it would end badly, it was in the air.

“Eat your supper. You won't get better by starving yourself.”

Halfway through dinner, Daryl threw up all over the table, and Edgar lost his mind.

The insanity of their house was impossible for Merle to get his head around. He didn't know what the hell Edgar was thinking, but he'd cause half the shit he got mad about in the first place.

Edgar grabbed Daryl and dragged him to the bathtub and tossed him in. He got the water going and told him to clean himself up but the water was too hot, and Daryl cried.

Merle got between them when Daryl began to scream and pulled him out, yelling at him to go hide.

A scuffle ensued, and Merle ended up at the receiving end of the belt. The belt was a whole other thing that only came out when one of them was really asking for it and getting between Edgar and dosing out his punishments was definitely asking for it.

Daryl was forced to watch while Merle got 25 smacks with the belt and it was the first time Edgar broke the skin on his back, but it wasn't the last.

This was reality for the brothers, and it kept on going, day after day, year after year until Merle was sixteen and Daryl was eleven. On a cold day in November Edgar Dixon died of cirrhosis and he was not mourned.

Their mother remained a silent figure in their lives until they were old enough to leave home and she moved out of state with a new man who neither of them respected.

They didn't keep in touch with her anymore. There was too much water under the bridge for reconciliation, and that was just for Oprah anyway, this was the real world.

Merle took one beating after another for Daryl and never regretted it or held it against him. In a strange way, he felt that if he could keep Daryl safe, then it gave his life meaning, it gave the beatings purpose. The only thing worse than pain for Merle was pain without gain. Daryl getting to have a childhood of some kind was the price he paid over and over without looking back, and he was never sorry for choosing it.

They grew up in north central Regina, but they got out together and made a life for themselves.

By the time Merle was 40 and Daryl was 35 they had been owners of a little auto wreckers on Industrial Drive for ten years called Auto Graveyard. The place turned a little profit, and they were comfortable. They didn't have much, but they had survived the past and Daryl was the apple of everyone's eye as he was meant to be. For years Merle was damaged, still, a prey animal who didn't really trust anyone, but they had each other, and in time he began to believe it could get better.

At the end of the day, Merle was still the big brother trying to shelter Daryl from danger and always would be. Making Daryl happy and giving him all he could gave his life purpose. Daryl was always more his child than his parent's, and he was his purpose.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

_ **Dealbreaker Chapter 2** _

 

“Shhhh....”

Merle pointed and signaled to Daryl to look straight ahead. Daryl nodded and followed behind him. They set their sights ahead into the thicker brush, breathing slow and steady.

Merle was closer and had a better shot, but he had faith in Daryl. He looked over and nodded his head once, and Daryl fired his rifle at the doe and dropped it cold.

“Nice one, little brother.”

Merle walked out of his hide and smacked him on the shoulder as they approached the animal to be sure it was dead.

“Dead as a doornail,” Merle commented.

“Why didn't you take the shot?” Daryl asked.

“You had it.”

They gutted the kill and took it back to camp in the back of Merle's truck. This was their annual hunting trip, and it had gone well as always. Every year they claimed deer sausage, roast, and jerky till the rapture and some brother time away from the world. Merle never felt completely comfortable around anyone but Daryl so he always looked forward to this trip. Working together and hanging out together worked for Merle but he figured someday Daryl would be married and things would change. In a lot of ways, Merle was shocked he wasn't married already. They had a business and stable income and Daryl owned a home, not to mention that every woman in a 50 km radius wanted him.

Daryl never had a shortage of offers from women, but he was awkward and liked to take it really slow, so it threw women off who were just expecting a good roll in the hay. It had been the same story ever since high school, every pretty girl who spoke to Merle was just looking to get closer to Daryl. Merle was used to it now even though it drove him crazy back in the day.

He really didn't blame women for wanting him; he just wished one of them would want him for the right reasons for a change. There was a lot more to Daryl than his appearance and women were missing out if they didn't see that.

When they got back to camp, they loaded up their gear and kills for the week and headed back to the city. They were coming back to a shambles at work. There was a new staff across the board, and they were losing their office expert Phyllis to retirement after ten years.

“Fuck, I don't even wanna get back to work. The place will be a mess without Phyllis,” Daryl groaned.

“She said her niece is stepping in until she finds something else, it'll be fine.”

“We got all those new people around the yard now, I don't even know who's who and I hired the bastards,” Daryl laughed.

“It'll be alright, I'll work tomorrow, and you just take 'er easy.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, man, no big deal.”

They dropped off their deer at the butcher's and filled out their orders for the packing and wrapping. Merle and Daryl had spent a whole week in the woods together but lived in the same big house so they wouldn't be escaping each other anytime soon.

The house was big enough they could avoid seeing each other if need be but they got along well and were normally single, so it just worked for them.

When they got home, Merle went to his area of the house, in the basement, and took a long, hot shower to get ready for work in the morning.

“You hungry!” Daryl shouted from upstairs.

“Yeah, but I'm fucking lazy too so fuck it!” he hollered back.

“I'm ordering a pizza from Houston's, you in?”

“Yeah!”

Merle had a shave and put on some tunes in his room, the old shit he liked best. Merle loved The Beatles, CCR, The Rolling Stones and Fleetwood Mac, all the old stuff he grew up on. They never had any new albums in the house growing up, so it was all kinda old when he played music even as a kid.

 

_Time is on my side...yes it is_

_Time is on my side...yes it is_

_Cause I got the real love, the kind that you need_

_you'll come running back_

_you'll come running back_

_you'll come running back to meeeee!!!_

 

Merle loved the fact that the house was big enough that he could sing at the top of his lungs and Daryl wouldn't hear it.

 

**#########################**

 

Daryl ordered the pizza and rolled his eyes at Merle singing like a moron downstairs. Either he wasn't shy about his singing, or he didn't think anyone could hear him, but Daryl never mentioned it.

He was cleaned up but exhausted and thankful that Merle agreed to take the bullet for him and play boss man at work the next day. Owning a business was a lot of work, and Merle always took the lion's share for some reason. Daryl was so accustomed to Merle taking care of things that it became a bad habit to let him, but he wanted to make it right.

Soon the pizza arrived, and Merle showed his face in the main upstairs living area. He usually kept to the basement and played his music, but they liked to eat together.

Merle grabbed a few slices and collapsed on the couch to eat.

“Do you know what today is?” Daryl asked.

“Yep, and I don't care.”

It would have been their father's birthday had he not drank himself to death, and Merle was surprised he'd even bring it up.

“Just sayin'.”

“What of it anyway?”

“Just thinking about him lately, about everything we went through.”

Merle was dreading the day Daryl would want to talk about the past but knew it would come. There were scars he'd never be rid of, but every single one on his back was one less on Daryl's so he just let it go. There was nothing they could do to change what happened, and they had survived, so he didn't know what else to say about it.

“He was such a prick, especially to you,” Daryl said, grabbing another piece.

“It's OK, I lived.”

“Good fuckin' riddance, right?”

“That's right. Fuck him,” Merle agreed trying to stop his mind going back to Edgar and that shitty little house.

They finished eating in silence, and Merle decided to turn in so he'd be less exhausted the next day.

“I can go in tomorrow,” Daryl said. He changed his mind about it after thinking of him and Merle as kids.

“Don't worry about it; I'm OK.”

Merle walked down to his basement suite that had everything he cared about. He had his hunting rifles, his stereo, his pool table, he was all set.

The last woman he's had, there was almost a year ago. She only stayed the night, and he couldn't even remember if the sex was any good cause he'd been drinking. Merle was just one of those guys who'd be single for life, and he accepted it. Someday Daryl would meet a woman and Merle would move into a little apartment by himself so they could have the house for a family, it was all in the cards already. Merle knew just what to expect from the future, and he was ready for it.

 

The next morning he woke up to the sound of his alarm and groaned, he felt older than his 40 years. His arthritis was acting up with the fall chill, but he didn't mention it to anyone, he just took his pain pills. He warmed up the truck and made a cup of coffee while Daryl slept in and was soon on the road.

He hit the highway out to the industrial area of town in the darkness of dawn. It was getting frosty in the mornings now. When he pulled up into the gravel yard of their business, he saw a car he didn't recognize parked in his spot. It had to be one of the new guys Daryl hired.

Merle parked his truck right behind it and hollered to, what looked like, one of the new guys crouched down checking the tire pressure.

“Hey, ya dumb fuck! Maybe nobody told ya, but this is my spot!”

It was just the way men spoke to each other, and he didn't think anything of it, none of the guys at work would think anything of it either, even the new guys.

He wanted to crawl under a rock, however, when a woman stood up slowly and looked at him with absolute astonishment all over her face.

“Excuse me?”

“Fuck me,” he winced.

She was wearing dark jeans, work boots and a flannel shirt with a ball cap. She just looked a man from a distance, and he never felt like such an asshole in his whole life.

“My tire is flat. I just stopped here cause it wouldn't move anymore.”

“I didn't mean it, honey. Shit! Here, lemme get that.”

“Are you my new boss?” the woman asked, looking at the parking decal that clearly said _Boss Man Parking._

“Fuck, I hope not. Are you Phyllis's niece?”

“Yes.”

“God damn it! She's gonna kill me if she finds out I talked to you like that, but I didn't know it was you.”

Merle took the tire wrench from her and bent down to start loosening the lug nuts, but when he looked up, she was smiling. She had short brown hair and eyes so blue they almost didn't look real. She was gorgeous.

“Are you really that scared of my great aunt, Phyllis?”

“Yep. She'd knock me down a peg for speaking like that to a woman.”

“Hey, why don't we just forget the whole thing?”

Merle sighed and laughed about his screw up.

“Yeah? I'll get this tire fixed, how's about that?”

“Deal. Thanks, I'm Carol.”

“Merle,” he answered, reaching up to shake her hand.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

_ **Dealbreaker 3** _

 

Merle took the tire and repaired the puncture for the new receptionist before he did anything else that day.

Carol's Aunt Phyllis had been with them since the very beginning and basically ran the place for them for years while they didn't have a clue what they were doing. She was a retired accountant who took pity on them and helped them out for the last ten years but she was finally retired for real now. Phyllis was tough and hilarious. She had a serious case of trucker mouth and could carry on inappropriate banter with the best of them.

Her niece had just moved back to Regina after spending some years out east, but they didn't know much more about her. If Phyllis said she was good for the job, then that's all they needed to know, her word was gospel.

“So, do I really look like a man to you?” Carol asked, watching him put the repaired tire back on her car.

“Hell no, just from a distance...I was tired and the way you were dressed....you don't look like a man.”

“I'm only teasing. My aunt told me to wear steel toed boots and dress down a bit. I guess I didn't look very feminine.”

Merle shrugged his shoulders, not sure how to respond.

“You definitely look like a woman, now that I can see ya properly.”

“Well, thanks,” she answered, smiling down to him.

She headed back inside and returned to answering calls and organizing their business.

By the end of the day, he knew she'd work out just fine. Carol was fast on the uptake and could handle being in a male dominated environment all day. She wasn't too offended by their jokes and language and worked hard.

By 4 pm he found himself staring at her from his office, and he had to remind himself to keep his eyes on his work. She had short hair, and he liked the way he could see the entire back her neck as she worked at the computer. His and Daryl's little office was right behind the front desk where she'd be working every day; it could get difficult.

Daryl called him at quitting time to see if he wanted to go for a drink and shoot some pool after work.

“Yeah, meet ya at Louie's?”

“Yeah, see ya there.”

 

 

**##########################**

 

“You didn't!”

“I did. I'm telling you I wanted to crawl under a fucking rock when I saw her face.”

Daryl laughed himself silly at his brother's story about meeting Carol.

“She'd gonna be one to hang on to if she didn't slug for that,” Daryl joked, lining up his next shot.

“She was way too nice about it; she should have given me some shit. I think she'll fit in just fine if she ain't scared off by me,” Merle laughed.

“She cute?” Daryl asked.

“Oh yeah, she's really pretty.”

“Even though you mistook her for a man? You can tell me if you like men, Merle, I won't judge you,” Daryl teased.

“Hey! I ain't got no problem with gay people, I just ain't one.”

“I know that. So she's nice looking?”

“Yep! Prettier than Phyllis that's for sure.”

“Phyllis is in her 60s, but she was cute when she was younger. I saw a picture of her once when she was 30, and I woulda fucked her,” Daryl joked.

“Christ Daryl, ask her out then.”

Daryl laughed and took another shot.

“Fuck it! Maybe I would if she wasn't such a ball buster, Phyllis is too tough for me.”

“This new girl has short, kinda light brown hair and big blue eyes...pretty smile.”

“Awww! Somebody's got it bad.”

“Nah, she's just pretty. You asked, and I'm telling you.”

“So ask her out then,” Daryl suggested, taking a sip of beer and sitting down on the nearest bar stool.

“Pfft! She ain't my type.”

“What does that even mean? You just said she was pretty.”

“It means I don't think she'd say yes,” Merle chuckled.

“You don't know that until you ask, Merle.”

“Nah, fuck it.”

Merle watched as Daryl took another shot and then took one himself.

“What's wrong with you? Just ask her out.”

“That's easy for you to say, I don't think you've ever heard no before. I don't wanna hear a speech from her and then have to see her every day at work.”

“What speech?” Daryl asked.

“Oh, Christ! You never heard the speech? There's a bunch of 'em! There's the 'I think you're really nice, but we'd make better friends' speech and the 'you're not really my type but can I get your brother's number' speech and the 'I like you, but you're more like a brother to me' speech.”

“Women really say that stuff?”

“Not to you they don't, but guys like me hear it pretty often,” he smirked.

“I didn't know it was that often.”

“I don't go around advertising that I'm every woman's last choice, would you?”

“That can't be true, Merle.”

“Afraid so, brother. We ain't all as blessed as you.”

They finished up their game after Merle promptly changed the subject. It was getting him down to think about his issues with the fairer sex, and he didn't feel like talking about it.

“I'll pay up and meet you at home,” he said, but Daryl insisted on paying.

“I got it, man.”

“Thanks.”

They walked out together, and Daryl got on his bike to head home. Merle had a truck and an old Dodge Challenger he'd fixed up, but Daryl rode his Triumph as late in the year as he could till it started snowing.

Merle drove around Wascana Lake and parked up at the 'Sugar Bowl' for a smoke break before going home. Merle and Daryl always called the bowl-shaped balcony over the water the 'Sugar Bowl,' all the kids did. There was a stairway leading down underneath where they caught minnows and crayfish when they were boys. Merle sat down on the dock and watched the streetlights dance on the surface of the water.

He took a long drag of his smoke and enjoyed the quiet. It was getting colder and winter was making it's approach, he could feel it in the air. Merle began to wonder if him staying at the house was preventing Daryl from moving forward. Maybe Daryl didn't want to take that step because of him. Maybe he felt bad for his eternal bachelor brother.

 

They had enough money to find their own places now, and maybe it was time. Daryl might just fly if he had the nest to himself.

Merle finished two smokes and skipped a few stones across the water before getting back in his truck.

When he got home, Daryl was passed out on the couch, having not made it through the movie he'd been watching.

Merle turned off the TV and tossed a blanket over his brother before heading down to the basement to sleep.

 

**#############################**

 

They drove into work together after stopping by the Tim Horton's drive-thru for coffee. Life for them had become routine on top of more routine.

“A medium double-double and a large black.”

“Is that everything for you?”

“Yep, thanks.”

When they arrived at work, Merle went right to the back to talk to the newer staff and get things organized for the day. All at once they had 3 of their regular guys leave, and it was a new crew for them to get used to.

Daryl walked into the office and found the new girl making coffee and humming to herself.

“Hey there,” he said, dropping his bag on his desk.

“Hi. Daryl, right?”

“That's me, you met Merle yesterday I take it.”

“Yep, that was fun,” she laughed.

“He's alright, just a mistake.”

“I know, we made up just fine. I like him.”

“Good, good. So, did you have any questions about the job or anything?”

“Actually, yes. My aunt was doing payroll and accounting, and I'm prepared to do that as well, but I need to know where she kept her employee files and all the tax papers.”

“You can do that too? I thought it was going to be just reception work. I've been trying to figure out the payroll program on the computer and getting nowhere fast.”

“No, I'm an accountant as well as an office assistant.”

“Holy shit! Sorry, that's great. We gotta hang on to you then,” he laughed. “Sorry, you probably never heard this kind of language at work.”

“I haven't, but I'm a big girl, I can handle it.”

“This could work out nicely then.”

“I think so too,” she agreed.

 

 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

_ **Dealbreaker 4** _

 

Merle decided it was pointless to keep thinking of their new employee the way he was so he let go of the pretense and just acted like himself around her. After thinking about it most of the night he decided Carol was well out of his league, even though he wished she wasn't. Wasting his time with good manners and airs and graces wouldn't do any good so he gave it up.

The next time he came in office he acted casual just like it was Phyllis at the desk again and put on the oldies station.

“Hey, Carol.”

“Hi, Merle. Did you see the Rider game last night?”

“Nope. I don't watch football but Daryl does.”

“Do you watch any sports?” she asked.

“I never got into it. I played a little football in school but never watched it much. I like music.”

“What kind of music?”

Merle looked up at her, surprised with the long line of questions. Nobody ever asked him this many questions at once.

“I like older music.”

“Me too.”

“My music's probably older than yours.”

“I'm 30, how old are you?”

“You're pretty forward, aren't ya?” he grinned. “I'm 40. Daryl's closer to your age, he's 35.”

“I like a lot of my parent's favorite music. I like CCR, Jim Croce, Fleetwood Mac, stuff like that.”

Merle was pleasantly surprised by her good taste in music but he wasn't about to be sucked into fantasy land, she wasn't for him. He used to get pulled into believing women might like him pretty easily but he'd learned his lesson. Merle was getting better at keeping his heart protected now, he had built a very high wall.

“Me too.”

Merle nodded with a friendly smile, grabbed a cup of coffee and got to work.

 

**######################**

 

Daryl arrived and started tearing apart a car for parts. He worked in his steel toes, a pair of grubby coveralls and work gloves. One of his new yard guys,

Shane worked along with him. They broke down the car into usable parts to sell and scrap while getting acquainted.

“So you and your brother opened this place ten years ago now, hey?”

“Yep. Hard to believe it lasted this long.”

“Yeah?”

“We didn't know shit about business; we almost did it just to see if we could.”

“Well, it worked.”

Carol came into the back to get some signatures on some checks and nodded to Shane.

“Hey there! Don't believe we've met. My name's Shane; I'm new here too.”

“I'm Carol, nice to meet you,” she smiled, taking back the checks from Daryl to return to the front.

“Hey now, wait up just a second...are you new to town, or...?”

Shane followed her up to the front to gab, and Daryl shook his head. Some men were really forward but not him. Shane was a big, strong ladies man type and he'd probably do just fine with the new accountant/receptionist. Daryl didn't have the energy to institute a no workplace dating policy. Daryl didn't care who was sleeping with who as long as everyone showed up and did their job. He kept on working on the car and sang along to Merle's oldies, not giving it another thought.

A few minutes later Shane returned and got back to work.

“So, did you get anywhere with Carol?”

“Nah, man. Struck out but it's early days yet, she'll come around,” he laughed.

“Good luck with that but don't go pestering her at work.”

“Me? Never! Give it a week she'll be chasin' me around, brother.”

Daryl laughed hard; he was gonna like having Shane around. They ran a loose ship, anyone not willing to work was let go but joking around and having a laugh passed the time and was encouraged.

“Cocky son of a bitch are we?” Daryl razzed.

“Hey some of us have something to be cocky about, what can I say?”

“I'll take your word for that.”

The two other guys he hired before the hunting trip were Axel and Oscar and they were a blast too. Daryl was relieved to see they lucked out after losing most of their crew recently to the oil patch in Alberta.

 

**########################**

 

It was another successful day at Auto Graveyard, but Merle and Daryl were starving and too tired to cook. Merle loved to cook, but some nights he was just too tired to care.

“Louie's?” Merle asked, shutting down his computer for the night.

“Yeah, fuck it,” Daryl agreed.

They closed up the shop, and all the men were gone for the day. Carol started her car and nodding to them both.

“Night, Carol!” Daryl called.

Daryl hopped on his bike, and Merle took his Challenger for a change. He never would have owned two vehicles, but when the 1970 Dodge Challenger found it's way onto their yard, he had to fix it up and make it his. It was fully restored from it's abused condition and he had it painted midnight blue by one of his many contacts in the car business. The Challenger represented renewal to him. Just cause the car had been treated like shit for years didn't mean it couldn't have a new start and be loved again. Merle really wanted to believe that kind of thing was possible.

He arrived at Louie's before Daryl and got a booth in the back near the pool tables, back where it was dark. Louie's was a shitty little bar in a bad neighborhood, but it felt like home to them since they'd been going there for years.

Daryl breezed in and plopped himself down across the table from Merle.

“I'm fucking starving!”

The waitress walked over and took their order and delivered their regular drinks.

“So what are the new guys like? I was working on inventory all day and didn't talk to anyone.”

“Shane's a laugh, and the other two are alright guys. Axel's kinda quiet, and Oscar is a good worker, he's smart and shows up on time. We got a good crew,” Daryl informed him.

“You did good with the hiring, Daryl. I was shitting myself when they all up and quit for Fort McMurray at the same damn time.”

“We're gonna be alright, especially with Carol manning the ship and doing all the books too, no worries.”

Their food arrived, and they both ate like they'd never seen food before. The bacon cheeseburgers at Louie's could feed an offensive lineman and fill him up.

“Jesus, these are good!”

“Yep,” Daryl agreed, “fuck cooking.”

Merle looked over Daryl's shoulder and noticed Carol walking in and sitting down at a table alone.

“Well, looky here,” he pointed.

They both watched her for a minute as she ordered a cup of coffee and a bowl of soup. She looked small and out of place in a dirty old bar like Louie's.

“We should say hi,” Daryl suggested.

“She don't wanna talk to her bosses after work, though, does she?”

“She's all by herself, though.”

“What do you plan to say?” Merle asked.

“I don't know, but she's eating alone, maybe she'd wanna come and sit with us. This place is kinda raunchy for a woman like her.”

Merle smiled, it was starting to look like Daryl was interested in her.

“Go for it, man.”

“You're not coming?”

“Nope, you go ahead.”

Merle watched as Daryl walked over to her and sat down across the table. Daryl had that shy but sweet

boy-like charm that all the girls fell for, he had stayed innocent. If Merle couldn't have her, then it only made sense for Daryl to try.

Soon Daryl was walking over to their table, carrying her soup for her.

“Hey, Carol. What are you doing in a place like this?” Merle asked as she sat down across from him.

“No good story there, I just like the French onion soup. I used to come here a lot before I moved out east.”

Daryl sat next to her, and they all chatted about her aunt Phyllis and just got to know each other more.

“I tried calling her a bunch of times, but she's always out. What's she up to now anyway?” Daryl asked.

“She can't sit still for five minutes, so she doing art classes again.”

“Art?” Merle asked.

“Oh yeah, she never told you? She sketches portraits, and she's really good actually.”

“How did she never mention that in ten years?” Daryl mused.

“She's kinda quiet about it. She's doing a class sketching nude male grad students at the University; she's loving it!” Carol laughed.

“I bet!” Merle chuckled.

Carol finished her soup, and the brothers started to shoot some pool.

“You two are good!” she noted after watching for a while.

“Merle's the real shark. Show her your trick shot.”

“Nah, she don't wanna she that.”

“Sure I do, lemme see!” Carol pressed.

Merle shrugged and set up the shot. He'd been doing the same old trick since high school where he could sink six balls across the table in one shot, but it still impressed Daryl for some reason.

Merle ran some chalk over the cue and bent down to shoot and caught her eyes across the table. He worried that her gaze would fuck up the shot, but he pulled it off.

“That was amazing, Merle!”

He shrugged and said thanks modestly.

They played another game and then decided to call it a night.

“I'll see you later, Daryl. Goodnight Carol,” Merle nodded, heading to his truck. He assumed they'd want to talk alone. Merle wished he didn't like her so much, but he did. She was really funny, and her eyes made him feel nervous inside but he was trying hard to ignore it, he needed to step back for Daryl's sake.

 

“Is Merle OK?” Carol asked.

“Yeah, I think so...it's hard to tell sometimes. I'll walk you to your car.”

“Thanks.”

Daryl waited for her to unlock the door and get in. It was a bad neighborhood, and late in the evening, he had to see that she got to her car alright.

“See you Monday.”

“Yeah, see ya,” he smiled.

Daryl liked how casual she was; he wasn't great at speaking to women despite Merle's whole idea that he was some kind of ladies man.

He got to his bike, threw his leg over and paused to watch her drive out of the parking lot before putting on his helmet.

Carol was sweet and pretty and smart, but something told Daryl to keep his distance, he sensed a conflict of interest.

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N I love all the messages in support of one or the other Dixons ending up with Carol:) It wasn't my intention for this story to become Team Merle vs. Team Daryl but I'm finding it really interesting:) The following message is not for you lovely people:) I love these messages and your interest in this story, thank you!!!_

_ **Dealbreaker 5** _

 

Monday morning came, and Daryl was eager to start pulling his weight just that little bit more around work. Spending the week hunting with Merle had made him realize how much Merle did for him.

Merle organized the trip, put down the deposit on the cabin, loaded the truck and was picking up the meat at the butcher on the way home.

“Merle, I was thinking. The annual charity steak night is coming up right away, why don't you let me take over the planning this year? It'll give you a break.”

“I do that every year, though. Do you know all the places to call?” Merle asked, surprised by the offer.

“Yeah, the list is in the front desk at work, I can do it. You shouldn't have to do it all every year.”

“Well...thanks. Anything you need just let me know.”

“It's fine; I got it covered.”

They arrived at work, and Daryl got busy making a list of calls to make. This was a yearly thing they did to raise money for the neonatal intensive care unit. It was a city-wide event where all businesses raised money, and they always did a steak night. All the money was then given to the local radio station for the radiothon where they would live broadcast for 36 hours straight.

Daryl started digging through the drawers at the front desk as Carol watched him.

“I moved some things. What are you looking for?” she asked.

“A notebook where Merle keeps a bunch of numbers for the steak night thing,” he answered, rummaging through the drawers.

“Here.”

Carol got up and went to a shelving unit, grabbed the book and handed it to him. She had done some reorganizing already, and he couldn't find anything.

“Oh. Thanks. I need this or I'll be screwed before I even start.”

“Can I help at all?”

“I couldn't ask you to do that. I want to do this for Merle this year.”

She looked interested but a little in the dark about what he meant so he explained.

“Merle always takes care of this...of everything really, and I want to do it this year. I wanna do more around here.”

“That's nice of you; I'm right here if you need any calls made. I am the receptionist, and this is a business thing after all.”

“Yeah?”

“I'm just sitting here, Daryl. All the paperwork is caught up.”

“Wow. OK, I need to call the printer people to make the invitations, and print the raffle tickets, and get a hold of the restaurant, and also the other auto wreckers and used car lots in town cause we always go in together on a raffle prize, and I don't even know what we're getting this year.”

She was jotting down what he was saying as he spoke and he noticed how fast she could write.

“OK. I got all that. What else?”

“Uh....fuck...um...”

Daryl looked through the book and read about 14 more things that Merle had jotted down.

“This is crazy huge!” he laughed. “I gotta do it, though.”

“Why?” she asked, genuinely curious.

“Huh?”

“If he normally does it why do you feel the need to do it this year?”

Daryl thought for a moment about how to put it.

“I owe him...he's done a lot of things for me, he always has, and I wanna do my share more.”

“That's good,” Carol said. “We'll get it all done then.”

 

They divided up the list into tasks, and she seemed enthusiastic to help him out. He couldn't help finding her eagerness to help sweet, but he pushed it to the back of his mind.

 

**############################**

 

 

That night, Daryl sat up with his phone making calls and preparing lists instead of chilling out and watching movies like he normally did. He had papers all over the kitchen table, and when Merle came in with the boxes of deer meat for the freezer, he offered to help just as Daryl knew he would.

“No, no I got it this year. You don't have to do anything.”

“I don't mind, Daryl. It's a lot of work.”

“I got it, and I can put the meat in the freezer too. Go relax.”

“Daryl, it's like 200 pounds of meat.”

“I got it, go!”

Merle frowned at him, obviously wondering what had come over him but went off downstairs as he was told.

Daryl packed up the meat in the freezer and made out the invitations after calling the restaurant and arranging the night for the event.

He'd have to send off the invitation layout to the printer and then get a hundred more things done in the next week but he was determined to do it, and he had Carol helping which was great. He turned in after midnight, and he felt he was starting to pay it back a little, Merle deserved it.

 

**##############################**

 

“ _Get over here ya little shit!”_

 _Daryl was snatched up like a puppy and dragged across the kitchen floor, and his heart raced with fear._ _The table was covered in his vomit, and he cringed at the sight of it._ _It was useless to fight, and he looked around frantically for Merle's eyes._

 

These memories were so prevalent in Daryl's mind lately, and he didn't know why. He didn't want to bring it up with Merle, so he was just stuck replaying them in his mind till he figured out why he was thinking of it again. For years he put it to bed, too busy creating a life for himself and running the business with Merle, but here it all was again.

 

_He was lifted and tossed into the tub, and he thought for a moment, in his six-year-old mind, that he was going to be drowned. He cried, he didn't know what else to do so he just cried._

_Daryl saw Merle come in the bathroom and he dreaded it, he knew it would end up being directed at Merle. Merle seemed to want it that way._

_Edgar turned on the old squeaky faucet, and scalding hot water started to burn his little sock covered feet, and he lifted them one at a time trying to keep them from the boiling water._

_He screamed, unable to escape the burning, and Merle grabbed his shirt and pulled him closer._

“ _Get out of here, Merle! This is none of your concern! He's my kid, get the fuck out!”_

_Merle pushed Edgar back as hard as he was able and grabbed Daryl under his arms, lifting him out._

“ _Run, go and hide,” he whispered to him._

_Daryl ran to his room and crouched in the closet, but soon a thundering voice came in, and then a big, strong arm yanked him out._

“ _You stand there and watch!” Edgar screamed. “Look what happens when you push me!”_

“ _Don't,” Daryl sobbed, realizing he was supposed to watch Merle take a beating for him. “I'll take a bath, just don't hit him!” he cried._

_Edgar told Merle to take off his sweater, and he did, with a blank expression. Merle held onto the kitchen chair in front of him and waited. A six-year-old wanting to kill his own father is as unhealthy as it gets, Daryl wanted to kill in that moment._

 

_Merle looked up at Daryl and nodded._

“ _It's OK, Daryl,” he insisted._

_Blow after blow came raining down on his young skin until it finally gave way after 25 strikes with the belt. Merle's breath caught in his throat, but he didn't cry, he was already so broken inside. Three different areas started to bleed down his back onto his one pair of good jeans, and he didn't even flinch._

 

Nothing could hurt Merle, at least that's what Daryl thought at the time. The truth was that he was just burying it all.

 

“ _You listen, and this doesn't happen. You got that, Daryl?_

“ _Yes.”_

“ _What? Louder, kid!”_

“ _Yes, Sir.”_

“ _I don't need another brat in this house who wants to push my buttons!”_

_Merle was looking at the ground, and their mother was nowhere to be found, hiding in her room pretending it wasn't happening no doubt._

_Edgar grumbled a little more and disappeared into the living room to keep drinking._

“ _Go to bed, Daryl,” Merle said, trying to fake a smile._

“ _But-”_

“ _Go on...it's cool, little man....I'm fine. OK?”_

_Merle raised his eyebrows and smiled widely to get the point across to the six-year-old._

_Daryl fell for it and got halfway back to the room before he turned around and saw the red lines and three places on his brother's back that were dripping blood._

_Merle went into the bathroom, presumably to clean it up, and they never spoke of it. Daryl never knew what to say._

 

It happened more than just that once, and Daryl never stopped feeling like shit because it often involved him somehow. For some reason, these memories were in his head more than ever, and he felt like he needed to figure out why or what purpose thinking of it could serve. There had to be a reason he was reliving this is his mind, and he was determined to figure it out.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

_ **Dealbreaker 6** _

 

Daryl was stepping up and helping out a lot more. Merle didn't understand it and never asked for it, but it was nice anyway. Daryl and Carol were busy at the front desk getting everything ready for the steak night, and he watched them, knowing there was something there, of course, there was.

Merle would be happy for him to end up with a woman like Carol even though he kept imagining himself with her. He tried not to think about what it could be like to kiss her every time he looked into her blue eyes, but it wasn't easy.

They would talk about music, and she'd laugh at all his attempts at humor, but he wouldn't let himself believe she could want him, it was a ridiculous notion.

 

**##########################**

 

“It's almost all ready; I can't believe it!” Daryl said, looking down at all the items checked off the list.

“It goes faster with two people,” Carol noted.

“Thanks a lot for all the help, I really wanted to do this for him.”

“No problem....I was actually going to ask you if you're going with anyone to this event.”

Daryl looked at her quizzically. He couldn't figure out if she was asking him out or not, he was never good at reading this kind of thing.

“Uh...no, just Merle.”

“I just thought maybe we could go together if you wanted to.”

Daryl paused for a beat and thought of Merle describing how pretty she was, the look in his eyes said it all and Daryl just couldn't do it.

“I can't...I'm sorry.”

“Oh,” she smiled. “Of course....well.”

“It's not you or anything I just...can't.”

“No need to explain, it's fine.”

Carol looked humiliated, and he felt like shit as she nodded her head and walked away from the front desk. He couldn't really blame her for needing to walk away; he would too. Daryl did like her, a lot more than he wanted to, but listening to Merle talk about being every woman's last choice was stuck in his mind. He just couldn't do this to him; he'd never even tell Merle she asked him at all.

 

**########################**

 

Around closing time, Merle was playing some music in the office and shutting down his computer while everyone else was finishing up in the back of the shop. Merle sang along at work when nobody was around, it passed the time, and Fleetwood Mac was hard not to sing along with.

 

_Can't you understand me_

_Baby, don't you hand me a line_

_Although it doesn't matter_

_You and me got plenty of time_

_There's nobody in the future_

_So, baby let me hand you, my love_

_No step for you to dance to_

_So slip your hand inside of my glove_

 

_Hold me...hold me...hold me....hold me..._

 

Merle was ducked down, grabbing his keys out of the desk drawer, when he heard the sound of Carol singing along at the front desk. Apparently, she had come back from the back and liked to sing at work too.

 

 

_I don't want no damage_

_But how am I gonna manage with you_

_You want a percentage, but I'm the fool payin' the dues_

_I'm just around the corner if you got a minute to spare_

_I'll be waitin' for you_

_If you ever wanna be there..._

 

She was nodding her head and collecting her purse as she sang, and he fell so hard, right then and there.

Merle grinned when she turned and realized he was there. Her face turned red, and he laughed as she covered her face.

“I was just singin' too, don't worry about it!” he insisted.

“OK, I feel better then,” she said, shaking her head.

She had about the prettiest smile he'd ever seen, and he couldn't help the way she made him feel. She looked so cute when she was embarrassed; he loved it. He wished he could just once fall for a woman who'd want him back. There were little moments that were ambiguous with her, and he'd wonder if maybe she did feel something, but he assumed it was wishful thinking.

 

Merle met Daryl out front for a smoke after locking up to shoot the breeze about the steak night.

“Everything's ready,” Daryl said, watching Carol drive away.

Merle noticed him watching her car, long after it left the parking lot and headed down the dirt road.

“You ask her out yet?” Merle asked.

“No.”

“How come?”

Daryl wasn't going anywhere near her; he just wouldn't do it.

“She's nice, but I don't feel that way about her.”

“Huh...I could have sworn I saw something between you two,” Merle said, flicking his cigarette onto the dirt.

“Just being nice cause, she helped out with the steak night. Gotta show appreciation to the staff and all that.”

“Guess I read it wrong,” Merle answered skeptically.

“Yep. You wanna go shoot some pool?”

“Sure thing.”

Daryl walked over to his bike and fired it up, leaving a trail of dust as he drove away.

 

**#######################**

 

A week later, when Friday rolled around, everything was well in order for the steak night on Saturday, and all the tickets had been sold. The same people came every year, so the invitations were more of a formality but Daryl had pulled it off, and he felt great.

Shane was hanging around the front desk chatting up Carol on the regular and Daryl tried not to pay any attention to it, but he got the full story by the end of shift on Friday.

“Told ya she'd go out with me,” Shane boasted.

“Yeah? Did you pester her enough?” Daryl remarked.

“She's letting me take her to that charity thing for work.”

“Cool,” he said, wishing she'd go for Merle instead of Shane. This was bound to end badly, Shane didn't strike him as the relationship type.

At least he wasn't betraying his brother, and she was free to see who she wanted.

 

Daryl figured he should mention it to Merle before the event so at least he'd be prepared for it.

“Carol's going to the steak night with Shane,” he blurted out over beers after work.

Merle looked up and nodded casually, but Daryl could see the hope die instantly in his eyes.

“That sounds about right,” he shrugged.

“What do you mean?” Daryl asked.

“She's pretty, and he's all handsome, it just makes sense.”

“It could have been you if you just asked her.”

“Don't be ridiculous, Daryl.”

“What's with you, Merle? You got issues or something?”

“Probably,” he admitted. “I was right, though, wasn't I? She wants somebody like Shane or you. It's alright, Daryl, that's just how the world works.”

“You gotta get out there and meet some people, Merle. You deserve somebody nice.”

“I'm fine on my own,” he said, lining up a shot and sinking the eight ball. “You ready to go?”

 

Back at home Merle was played somber sounding music in the basement, and Daryl was glad he'd turned Carol down, he didn't want to be the reason for Merle's misery. He'd never let a woman come between them no matter how pretty, smart and kind she was. Daryl knew he could fall in love with someone like her so easily, he could feel it already, but Merle was his brother so what could he do?

It would hurt like hell to see her with someone else but not as much as if he'd let Merle down. How this woman had come into their world and gotten them all screwed up, he'd never know, but she seemed to be attracting everyone's attention. Axel and Oscar were even talking about her in the coffee room earlier that week, it was almost comical, but it was sure to lead to conflict.

Shane ended up being the one to take her out, and Daryl dreaded having to see it at the steak night the next day, but mostly he hated it for Merle's sake.

Daryl tried to ignore the depressing music from the basement, but he could feel Merle's sadness radiating up through the floorboards like the tell-tale heart.

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

**_Dealbreaker 7_**  
  
Merle was up early, cleaning his truck out before the snow fell on Saturday morning, it was getting colder every day, and he needed a lot of distraction. He'd spent the whole night feeling awful and needed the fresh air, mentally he was circling the drain.  
The steak night was usually something he really looked forward to, but it would be different this year. He felt too old for envy, but he still couldn't help thinking of Carol and Shane together.  
He cranked up the music in his truck, swept out the floor and gathered up the scraps of paper and empty water bottles.  
“Hey, Merle!” came a voice out of nowhere.  
It startled him, but he quickly realized he knew the voice. He looked up, and Theodore was getting out of his car in the driveway.  
Theodore had been working for them until just recently when he ran off to Fort McMurray for some fast money.  
“What the hell are you doing here, T?” Merle asked, happy to see his face.  
“Got a week off, so I came back to see my girlfriend. I thought I'd come say hi before I head back tomorrow.”  
“You gonna bring her to the steak night tonight?” Merle asked, taking a break from the cleaning.  
“Don't have a ticket,” he answered.  
“You don't need one, man, just bring her.”  
“OK, thanks. So what's up around the old auto graveyard? How are the new guys working out?”  
“Great, so far,” Merle answered, offering him a smoke.  
“Thanks, you should really consider coming up to work for a few months, man. The money is stupid good up there! The hours are brutal, but a guy like you could really make some good money fast since you have your 1A and forklift ticket.”  
“Nah, I don't wanna stay in some fleabag motel. I went up there a few years ago and ended up in a total dive for three months,” he shuddered.  
“You wouldn't have to, my sister Jacqui rents out rooms. You could just stay with her like I do.”  
“Huh...it's a thought.”

“It's more than a thought. Come up and keep me company for a while, that place is a bit of a ghost town.”  
The idea of getting away appealed to him, and he kept thinking about it all afternoon. The whole thing with Carol and Daryl and Shane already weighed on him, and with Daryl stepping up he was sure he could handle things for a few months. Merle also thought it might be an idea for Daryl to have some space to meet someone. Having the house to himself could be just what he needed.  
  
#########################  
  
By 5 pm Merle was in the shower washing up for an evening of watching Carol get pawed over by Shane, and he was dreading it. He shaved and put on his 'I'm a real businessman' clothes that he didn't really like. He wore his black dress pants and a blue dress shirt with a tie. Work charity events demanded that he looked like he actually ran a business.  
He stared at himself in the mirror and shrugged. He gathered up the raffle prizes and threw them in the backseat of his car.  
“You coming with me?” he asked Daryl.  
“Nah, I'm taking the bike out while I still can.”  
“Alright, meet you there.”  
Merle arrived at the restaurant and made sure all the arrangements were in order, and it looked like Daryl had gotten everything right.  
Soon Daryl arrived and so did Theodore and his girlfriend, Karen. They all talked and caught up on what was going on with everyone and Theodore mention to Daryl about offering Merle a place to stay if he took a job up at Fort McMurray. Daryl looked shocked by it and not terribly happy, but Merle figured they should talk about it later.  
“I was just thinking about it, that's all.”  
“Well just unthink about it. You hated it up there, remember?” Daryl added.  
“Just cause of where I was staying, T says I can stay with him and his sister. I was just thinking about it anyway. Relax.”  
Daryl dropped it and went about his duties as business owner for the night.  
Shane arrived with Carol, and she already looked a little annoyed. Merle soon noticed Shane was drinking more than everyone else and he could see a mess coming on.  
The dinner was great, and everything came out on time. Over the course of the evening they beat their normal total for donations, it was a great success for them.  
Merle went outside for a smoke after he'd had enough socializing for one evening.  
He lit his smoke and loosened his tie, taking in the crisp air. It would be snowing any day now.  
He took a slow drag and looked up at the stars. Carol came out the back door of the restaurant then to join him.  
“Hey, Merle.”  
“Hi.”  
“Can I get a light?” she asked, pulling her sweater around her shoulders.  
He leaned in and lit her smoke without a word then put his lighter back in his pocket.  
“You OK?” she asked.  
“Fine...you?”  
“I've had better evenings. I wish I'd told Shane, no, but he wouldn't leave me alone about it,” she sighed, ashing her smoke and shivering.  
Merle took off his suit jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders to keep her warm; he was a gentleman regardless of who she'd come with. A cold woman was a cold woman.  
She smiled up at him, and he gave her a little half smile back. Fort McMurray was looking better every second, being around her was starting to hurt.  
She pulled his jacket in close around her neck and continued to smoke.  
“Is he treating you OK?” he asked finally.  
“He's drinking too much and being pretty grabby. He's not taking me out again, that's for sure.”  
“Tell me...or Daryl if you need anything, OK?”  
“Thanks, it should be alright if he just slows down on the drinks.”  
They walk back in together, and she handed him back his jacket.  
“Thank you, Merle. You're a sweetheart.”  
He chuckled silently and went to sit back at the bar.  
Shane eventually got belligerent with a man from a used car dealership they did a lot of business with and Merle was forced to intervene.  
“Shane, cool it,” he warned.  
The scuffle escalated, and Merle ended up having to talk it out with everyone involved to maintain good business alliances and get Shane under control.  
By the time it was resolved Merle sent Shane off in a cab, and Carol had no way to get home.  
“Daryl can take you home,” Merle offered.  
“He has his bike, though, and I'm in a dress,” she said. “I can just take a cab.”  
“You don't have to do that; I'll take ya,” he offered.  
Daryl waved to them as they walked out and had a funny smile on his face.

Carol being around the place had shaken everyone up, and Merle didn't know if he was coming or going anymore.  
He got in the car and fired up the engine.  
“This is a beautiful car, Merle, 1970?”  
“Yep, you know cars?”  
“A little bit. You don't mind driving me?”  
“Nope, ain't got nothin' else to do.”  
He put the car in reverse and lay his arm across the back of her seat to navigate out of the parking spot.  
She had on a red dress and black high heels, she looked beautiful and smelled like a dream come true.  
“Which way am I headed?” he asked, waiting at the main street for her directions.  
“300 block Park Street.”  
He turned left and pushed a cassette in the old tape player.  
  
**_Oh, I'm never gonna be the same again,_**  
**_Now I've seen the way it's got to end,_**  
**_Sweet dream, sweet dream..._**  
  
**_Strange magic,_**  
**_Oh, what a strange magic,_**  
**_Oh, it's a strange magic._**  
**_Got a strange magic,_**  
**_Got a strange magic._**  
  
  
“More old music,” he commented, keeping his eyes on the road.  
  
“I like it, ELO's great. You look so different in a suit.”  
  
“Pfft! Don't feel right but sometimes you gotta.”  
  
“You look nice,” she answered softly.  
Merle felt confused by it all, but he'd seen the way she and Daryl interacted, and it looked like something was going on, but then there was Daryl telling him he had no feelings for her. Merle had feelings, though, feelings that wouldn't leave him in peace. Merle couldn't stop thinking of her smile and hearing her singing in his head. Thoughts of her were climbing his wall of protection, and soon he'd be completely at their mercy.  
He kept on driving but said nothing.  
"You're so quiet tonight," Carol noted.  
"Just thinking, I got offered a seasonal job, and I'm considering it."  
"Where?"  
"Fort McMurray."  
"Oh, so you'd be gone then."  
"Yeah, for a few months anyway. Good money, though, also thinking of finally moving outta Daryl's place."  
"Lots of changes then."  
"Daryl needs the place to himself; then he might settle down a bit."  
"You settling down too?"  
"I'm as settled as I'm gonna get, I think."

“I hope you don't go; I'll miss you around work.”  
Everything she said left him more confused, but he didn't want to read anything into her words just to end up kicking himself. He pulled up outside her house when she pointed that they were there, and waited while she dug around in her purse for her keys. She looked at him and smiled, and his hopeful heart was grasping at straws. He wanted to believe her eyes were trying to tell him something.  
"Thanks, Merle."  
“No problem.”

“It could have been a nicer evening if I hadn't gone with Shane...but your brother turned me down,” she sighed.

Merle smiled, a huge phony smile, as his heart broke in two. Everything was just as he suspected and yet it still stung like crazy. He thought he had accepted the truth but until she put out the fire of possibility he'd been hanging on to hope, and that was obvious now. They all wanted Daryl, why should she be any different? Why couldn't she be any different?

“I didn't know you asked him.”

“It doesn't matter,” she shrugged. “Just sucks being turned down, you know?”

“I could write a book on the subject....he was a fool to say no,” he answered, trying to keep it all together long enough for her to get out of the car.

 

She leaned in and hugged him quickly, and it hurt like being slugged in the gut. Her hair smelled of lilacs and she felt soft and warm in his arms.

“Goodnight.”

She got out, and he watched her walk away until she got inside her house.

“You really are an idiot, aren't you?” he sighed to himself.

Fort McMurray was the only answer. Merle felt low and unloved and desperately in need of some space. His chest felt tight, and he drove for a long time before stopping to call Theodore about the job.

 

Merle had to take his mixed tape out of the car stereo halfway through Songbird by Fleetwood Mac...he wasn't made of stone.

 

 **_For you, there'll be no more crying._ **  
**_For you, the sun will be shining._**  
**_And I feel that when I'm with you,_**  
**_It's alright; I know it's right._**

 **_To you, I'll give the world._ **  
**_To you, I'll never be cold._**  
**_'Cause I feel that when I'm with you,_**  
**_It's alright; I know it's right._**

 **_And the songbirds are singing like they know the score._ **  
**_And I love you; I love you, I love you, like never before._**

 **_And I wish you all the love in the world._ **  
**_But most of all, I wish it from myself._**

 

###################################

****Just FYI Songbird by Fleetwood Mac is one of the most beautiful songs ever written, and it could make me bawl at the drop of a hat. If you've never heard it, I recommend giving it a listen, and you'll fully understand why Merle couldn't listen to it:(

I'm sick to write this I know, but it's going to work out really good, please trust me:) 

Also, Carol is NOT being cruel or leading him on; she has no idea he likes her. Sometimes it's not obvious to the other person, and she has no idea I swear. She is not a heartless person in this story; she was also just recently rejected herself by Daryl.

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

_ **Dealbreaker 8** _

 

Merle hoped Daryl would still be up when he got back and he was, he needed to air everything out.

“Hey, Merle. That Shane is a moron, he's getting one more chance, but then I'm letting him go,” Daryl complained.

Merle walked into the living room and sat down on the couch to talk; he needed to ask him about it.

“She asked you to take her...and you said no?” Merle came right out with it.

“She told you that?”

“Yeah. Why'd you say no?”

“I told you, I don't like her like that.”

“I saw you with her...why are you lying to me?”

“I'm not, just leave it alone.”

“Daryl, I need to get out of here for a little bit, I'm gonna take that job.”

“Why? Over a woman? Don't be stupid.”

“I know you don't understand...but I really liked her. I almost let myself believe she might want me but it all turned out just like I knew it would. I need to get away from here...I just can't stand looking at her all day.”

“Merle...I don't want you to go up there.”

“I need this, Daryl.”

Daryl saw the sadness in his eyes, and he knew this was more than he thought. It was more than a little crush that didn't pan out; Merle was crazy for her.

“You're coming back, right?”

“Yeah, in a few months. It'll do you good to have the place to yourself. You don't need me here cramping your style anyway.”

“Where is all this bullshit coming from? I like you being here. I'm the one who asked you to live with me when you wanted to get your own place in the beginning.”

“I know, but we can't stay like this till we're old men. You gotta find somebody and settle down; you can't do that with me here.”

“Merle, have you lost your mind? I never said I even want that.”

“I just need a few months to work this out, and I can make some extra coin to invest back into the business, we can get that new hoist we need.”

“I don't like this.”

“Neither do I, to be honest, but I really think I need it.”

“When are you going?”

“I called T, and I'm going back with him tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow? You're leaving so soon?”

“I can still do the invoicing up there on my laptop and the ordering, but with you and Carol there you'll manage just fine without me. She's got that place running as well as Phyllis ever did.”

“Merle...”

“It's gonna be fine; it's just a couple months....I just can't be around her. Please understand.”

 

**#########################**

 

In a funny way, Daryl was ticked off at Carol for hurting Merle, but he knew deep down that it wasn't her fault that she didn't want him. He just wanted so badly for it to be Merle getting what he wanted for a change. This had happened to Merle too many times over the years.

Why nobody seemed to see what he did, he'd never know. If Merle loved you, there's nothing he wouldn't do for you. He was loyal to the point of personal bodily harm, and yet women always seemed to overlook him, it was starting to get to Daryl. He didn't want to be happy with anyone if Merle couldn't be as well. Daryl knew he could have someone, but he wouldn't do it until he knew Merle would be happy too.

When Daryl got up the next morning, Merle was already packed up to leave, and it killed him.

“Forward me the invoicing every night, and I'll still do the weekly ordering if you want,” he said, standing at the front door with his suitcase in his hand.

“This is bullshit, Merle.”

“Can you promise me something, little brother?”

“Anything.”

“Open your eyes and just try to see what's in front of you...you might want things you never thought about.”

“That's pretty cryptic, Merle.”

“Just do it, and you'll see what I mean. Drive my truck or the Challenger when the snow starts to fly. T says there's a carpool,” he said, tossing his keys up the stairs of the landing to him.

“OK.....bye, Merle.”

“It's only a few months,” Merle smiled, always trying to make Daryl feel better about things.

Daryl watched him leave when T pulled up and honked the horn. He hated it, and he didn't fully understand how he could need to be away from her so badly.

 

**###########################**

 

Carol was sat at the desk, chatting with Axel when Daryl arrived. Carol was always the first one there to open up, just like Phyllis had done for years.

She looked up when he entered and then carried on talking without much expression. He could sense that her pride had taken a hit, and he felt awful, but he couldn't hurt Merle, not after everything.

“Morning,” he said, heading straight for his office.

 

It was an hour later before he decided to inform everyone about Merle leaving. It would be easier than having to explain it to everyone separately. He called the whole group to the front on the intercom and got it done within one short announcement.

“Merle's gonna be gone for a couple of months. He's up at Fort Mac until further notice. If you need anything from him, you can text him. The number's on the bulletin board.”

“Why is he up there?” Shane asked.

“He just is, he'll be back, though.”

Daryl didn't feel right about anything and just wanted to be alone, so he shrugged and walked into his office and shut the door.

The morning passed slowly, and he felt lost without him around. Merle's coffee cup was still on the desk, his music was still in the stereo, but now he'd run off over a woman, and it was driving Daryl crazy.

 

 

**############################**

 

Daryl was scared he wouldn't be able to handle everything without Merle, so he was hyper aware of everything he did suddenly. He knew his brother needed this time to figure things out and he didn't want everything to fall apart while he was gone. It dawned on him that to do that he'd have to figure out a way to make amends with Carol. She was key to everything running smoothly, not to mention that he knew he'd hurt her and he felt like garbage about it.

Daryl spent the morning doing any extra work he could while everyone else picked up the pace as well after sensing his tension.

He looked through his door at the back of Carol's neck and tried to imagine treating her like any other staff member like he didn't feel anything for her.

She came in to check on a shipment for Oscar and didn't even smile at him. It was obvious she felt uncomfortable now being around him and knowing he'd caused it made him feel really bad.

“Thanks,” she said, collecting the order.

He didn't know how to handle it. Daryl wanted her to feel better, but he didn't want to lead her on. There's no way he could have Merle come home to find them together; he was stuck in a bad position.

Due to plain old cowardice, he settled on leaving a note on the front desk. It was about the most juvenile idea he'd ever had, but he couldn't say it to her face.

 

_**I had to say no about the other night. I wanted to go, but it's really complicated, and I can't even tell you why I couldn't say yes. It has nothing to do with you. I honestly think you're great. I didn't mean to be rude to** **you or hurt your feelings. I'm really sorry. Daryl**_

 

Daryl left the note on her desk and waited for her to come back from lunch. He got up four times to take the note back but sat back down every time.

Eventually, she walked back to the front with a fresh cup of coffee and picked it up.

He wanted to hide but just kept his head down and continued working. There's no way she could respect him after doing something so childish so he wouldn't have to worry about keeping his distance from her anymore.

 

The long first day without Merle finally ended, and he hated it already. The shop was too quiet without Merle's singing that he thought nobody could hear. It was just wrong for him to not be there.

He didn't want to go to Louie's alone, and he tried to think of something to eat all by himself. He looked out the window, and the snow was starting to fall, it felt so appropriate.

By the time Daryl got home at the end of the work day, he knew Merle would be arriving in Fort McMurray soon. It was a 12-hour drive away, but it may as well have been the other side of the universe.

Daryl was beginning to see that maybe he relied on Merle's companionship too much cause he felt completely alone in the world. He had a huge house to himself, and it was so empty now. That last time Merle had gone away for work he had a girlfriend, so the time had flown by, but he lost that girlfriend not long after Merle got home.

Merle's music wasn't coming up through the floor, letting him know what kind of mood he was in. His gravelly voice wasn't singing along; nothing felt right.

Daryl poured a whiskey and sat in front of the TV, trying to get interested in anything but he just couldn't.

His phone buzzed, and he hoped it was Merle, but it wasn't.

  
_**~ Thanks for the note. No worries at all, it just hurt my pride, but I'll be OK. Carol** _

 

He wanted to call Carol and tell her he wanted her and how beautiful he thought she was but he couldn't. He poured another drink and then crawled into bed feeling low and lost and lonely.

 

**##########################**

_I'm posting chapter 9 as well in just a couple hours and it's a happier chapter I promise, it's even pretty funny in places I hope! Love ya, Teagan xoxo_

_This story is way less sad from here on in:) YAY!!!_

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

_ **Dealbreaker 9** _

 

“Gonna be great to have you out there, Merle,” Theodore exclaimed. “I was surprised you said you wanted to come on such short notice.”

“I have to get away for a bit and not staying in a cheap hotel sounds great.”

“My sister has a pretty little house on the main road, and she's been renting out rooms ever since her husband passed away, so three years now I think. She's really relaxed about house guests too.”

“Sounds perfect.”

The drive up to Fort McMurray was a long one, and before long he poured out his heart to T about Carol. Theodore was always easy to talk to, and he couldn't help unburdening himself.

“Daryl always did get the chick's attention though I guess,” T laughed.

“I get it, I don't even care most of the time, but I really liked her. He says he doesn't like her, but I don't know, it sure looked like he did to me.”

“Daryl's hard to pin down. I could never tell what the hell he was thinking.”

“If I spend some time away he'll figure out what he wants; it's about time he settled with someone.”

“What about you?” T asked.

“I tried for years, man, nobody wanted to settle with me. If I had it my way I'd already have a wife and a field full of kids but it just didn't play out that way.”

“You'll find somebody. Can't believe a man who wants a family as much as you can't find a woman.”

“I guess I'm just ugly enough to stay single forever,” he laughed. He was good at self-deprecation at this point and could still laugh at himself.

“No way! You're real pretty, Merle,” T joked.

“Well, marry me then for fuck sake!”

They both laughed at that and carried on the journey together.

When they pulled up, Theodore led him in to put away his stuff in the main level bedroom his sister had left cleaned up for him. Her bedroom was right next door to Merle's, and T had the bedroom upstairs. There was another upstairs room, but the other tenant had only just moved out.

“It's a nice little house,” Merle mused. “Where's your sister?”

“Working. She works a few days a week at the drug store, but she's here most of the time. I work nights so I gotta get moving pretty quick and I can take you tomorrow afternoon to get work.”

“Thanks a lot, man. Think I'm gonna go drown my sorrows for the night and get it outta my system. Where's the bar?”

“You're in luck; it's just stumbling distance down the road.”

T handed him a key and told him to be quiet when he got back.

“No problem. She knows I'm staying, though, right?”

“Yeah, she knows.”

“Good, I don't wanna put the fear of God in a woman I never met in the middle of the night,” he laughed.

 

 

Merle got changed after the long car trip and walked to the local bar. It was a small city that revolved around the oil industry, and he only wanted one thing before starting work, and that was alcohol. He didn't normally drink much, and even though he knew it wasn't wise, he just wanted to forget for a little while.

 

The bar was almost too close; he could be spending a lot of time in there. He entered and looked around him at the dull and lifeless atmosphere. There were no women in sight, only a bunch of lonely men and many of them were far away from home. Men came from all over Canada to work at Fort McMurray for the good money and easy to find work.

He pulled up a seat at the bar and ordered a few drinks just to start. He lit a smoke, and nobody talk to him, he was nobody in the middle of nowhere.

It was the perfect place to forget, but her smile was still trapped in his mind. Merle listened to the music playing, and it seemed that every single song was a sad one. He left Daryl a brief text to let him know he arrived in one piece and then turned off his phone.

 

He put his phone down and continued to drink, hoping for distraction but with all the sad music he seemed to remember even more sharply. It wasn't just Carol; he could accept her wanting to be with someone else, it was how often this happened. He wanted so badly to have someone to spend his life with.

Merle really wanted to know what his life was supposed to be like. Was he supposed to be alone forever? What kind of woman would ever fall for him?

He was forty and had never heard I love you.

The bar closed a little after 1 am, and he was the last person there. Merle hadn't eaten any food since lunchtime, and he hadn't had so many consecutive drinks in ages, he was drunk as a skunk.

“Gotta get going, man. You need a cab?” the bartender asked.

“No...it's just...down the road.”

He was slurring and dizzy and regretting going overboard cause he felt even worse than when he walked in. He got out onto the street, and it was cold and crisp. It suddenly hit him just how tanked he was, and it was bad.

He didn't know, for a moment, which direction to go but then he recognized the way he'd come and walked that way. He tripped, trying to walk up the steps and came crashing down like a pile of bricks on the porch.

His knee was throbbing where he landed, and he knew it would hurt bad in the morning.

He sat on the step for a moment and thought he should try to compose himself a little before going in, so he pulled out a smoke and promptly lit the wrong end.

“Fuck!” he hissed, throwing the useless smoke on the pavement. He tried again and succeeded.

“Merle Dixon! You're a moron!” he said in a loud voice. It felt like nobody existed for miles around in the tiny city, so he continued talking to himself. “Nobody loves a moron...or a drunk guy talking to himself....stupid Daryl had to be all perfect...nah! I love Daryl; he's my baby brother so....but he doesn't even want her though so what the fuck?...nobody's ever gonna love me, and I'm gonna die all alone in the dirt....stupid, drunken, dope....”

“Excuse me; I take it you're Merle Dixon.”

Merle heard a voice above and behind him.

He turned around but found he couldn't get up, so he looked up at her from his hands and knees.

There was a woman standing over him, and he assumed it was T's sister, it had to because she knew his name.

“I think so,” he answered.

She looked a little annoyed, so he tried to grin at her to soften her disposition, but she only folded her arms.

“Well? Are you or aren't you?”

“Yeah, I'm Merle.”

“You coming in?” she asked.

He didn't know if he could stand without falling, so he actually crawled across her doorstep.

“I drinked too much tonight.”

“You don't say,” she answered in a deliciously snarky tone.

“I do...I really do say,” he mumbled.

“If it weren't for T, I'd be leaving you on the porch in this state, but he's vouching for you big time.”

Merle watched her mouth moving and tried to make sense of her words, but she seemed to be talking really fast.

“You're Jacqui!” he exclaimed randomly.

“Good grief! You really did drink too much. I'm going to grab a garbage can for you in case you decide to throw up, and you can go to your room...if you can walk.”

“Where?” he asked.

“Merle, you've already been there,” she sighed. “It's the second on the left,” she reminded him.

Merle liked her eyes, and he found himself just staring at them as she spoke.

“Your eyes look almost kinda green in this light.”

“They're brown, I assure you.”

“You'd know...they are your eyes.” He laughed a little too hard at his own drunken joke, and she looked down at him and shook her head.

“Good lord, what am I going to do with you?” she winced. “I'm gonna get you that garbage can. Off to bed with you.”

She walked up the steps to the second level, and he forced himself to his feet. He knew just enough to know he was making an ass of himself.

Merle stumbled, holding onto the walls as he made his way toward the doorway and the bed looked so good he couldn't wait to collapse in it. He groaned loudly as he fell onto the bedspread and moaned at the softness of the sheets and the pretty smell, like fabric softener and heaven. He couldn't sleep in his jeans no matter how shit faced he was and used his last bit of brain power to take off his pants and socks before kissing the world goodnight.

 

**###########################**

 

“Merle....Merle....”

He opened his eye only a tiny bit because the room was so bright. He was laying on a flowery quilt in nothing but his boxers and his shirt when T came in trying to wake him.

“Hey...” he uttered in a scratchy sounding voice.

“Dude, you're in my sister's bed.”

Merle opened his eyes and jolted up to a hands and knees position of readiness.

“What?”

He looked around him and, sure enough, it was a woman's bedroom. Flowery sheets, perfume on the dresser, girly shit every place he looked.

“Oh....my...God....”

He looked at T and grimaced.

“I'm so sorry, man.”

“It's OK. I told her this ain't like you, but you had some woman troubles and overdid it.”

“Where did she sleep?” Merle asked, getting up and putting on his pants.

“The spare room.”

“Jesus! I gotta go say sorry.”

“She's at work already. I have to bring her the lunch she forgot to take before I can sleep.”

“I'll take it to her. You just worked graves, go to bed.”

“You sure? She might still be in a mood about it.”

“I gotta make things right with her if I'm staying here, I got it,” he insisted.

Merle got showered and looking presentable and left the house to go makeup with a woman he'd only just met. He was becoming infamous for making terrible first impressions with the fairer sex.

 

 

 

 

 


	10. Chapter 10

_ **Dealbreaker 10** _

 

Daryl still hadn't heard from Merle besides a short text letting him know he got there alive.

He woke up the next day determined to try and face the world like an adult with a brother who had up and disappeared and a woman he wanted but couldn't pursue.

Axel was trying to crack jokes and lighten the mood around work and annoying everyone, but he had good intentions. The staff knew there was something up but didn't know what, so they all walked on eggshells.

Carol was still quiet but was smiling again and chatting with Oscar a lot. Daryl pretended he wasn't watching, but Shane was obviously jealous. He wasn't sure if Shane was going to work out which was a shame because Daryl thought he'd make a good addition to the place when he hired him.

He was watching the drama percolate when the phone rang, and he was actually really happy to hear the voice on the other end.

“Daryl! Long time, no speak!”

“Hey you! I hear you're drawing naked boys you dirty old bitch.”

“Awwww! Daryl, are you just jealous I didn't ask you to model for me?” Phyllis teased.

He needed to hear her voice but hadn't even realized it until that moment.

“You don't have a canvas big enough for all that hotness,” he insisted.

“I'd give it a shot anyway!”

“Get out your bifocals then, Grandma.”

“Hey! I'm gonna come down there and beat your ass black and blue for the Grandma jokes!”

He yawned audibly over the phone and then laughed. Nobody was as cool as her; he wanted her back so bad.

“So how's my niece doing around there? I finally got done with my naked art classes, and she's flooded my inbox with messages.”

“She's good, I think. Got all the boys kinda fired up, though.”

“Uh oh,” she laughed.

“A bunch circling wolves around here, you didn't say she was so pretty.”

“I take it you're one of the wolves,” she sighed.

“Kinda but I can't go there...it's a long story.”

“Can't wait to hear it.”

“Merle's gone up to Fort Mac working for a few months.”

“Oh no! I was gonna ask if he wanted to shoot some pool tonight actually.”

“I can play pool too, you know?” he complained.

“Yeah, but Merle's more challenging. You wanna go?”

“Sure. I'll come get you after work on the bike.”

“Cool, see ya later.”

 

 

**############################**

 

Merle walked to the pharmacy carrying the lunch bag, going over what he could say to a woman who's bed he'd just stolen for the night.

It wasn't far to walk; nothing was very far in a city this size. He opened the door, and a bunch of jingling bells startled him overhead. He looked around, and the place was deserted which would make his public apology easier. He spotted her across the store, writing something on a clipboard.

He approached slowly and stood at the counter for a few seconds before she looked up.

The expression on her face when she recognized him was priceless.

“Merle! What are you doing here?”

“I...uh..brought your lunch for you and I wanted to talk to you so...”

Another customer came in then, a very little, very old man with a cane. Merle looked around the store nervously and decided just to spit it out before she got too annoyed.

Her eyes were a little stunned still to see him but she took the lunch bag and said thank you.

“I just wanted to tell you that I'm not usually like this but I had a bad couple weeks and I overdid it last night.”

She looked uncomfortable to be having this conversation at work, and he was steadily questioning the idea to come and do this now, but he was already rambling.

“It's OK, Merle.”

“No, it's really not. It was rude and inconsiderate to drink so much and end up in your bed like that.”

Merle looked down, and the little old man was suddenly right behind him, grinning from ear to ear.

“Not like that...not like that...” Merle stuttered.

“Merle. Seriously, it's OK,” she insisted.

Merle looked down at the man, who didn't look like he believed a word of it, and then back at her.

“I actually made it worse, didn't I?” he frowned.

“A little bit,” she winced.

“I'm really sorry, OK? I'm gonna go now, but I'll make it up to you, I promise.”

She looked embarrassed but nodded and smiled at him.

“It's fine....I'll see you later, OK?”

“Yeah....sorry.”

Merle walked out onto the street and groaned. He was getting good at screwing up with women but she did seem pretty understanding about it.  

He headed back to the house and got busy cleaning up to try and get back on her good side. Her house was full of cool looking art and trinkets from her travels, lots of souvenirs. By the looks of it, she traveled a lot and had been to some amazing places. Germany, Jamaica, Australia and France just from the obvious ones but it looked like there were a lot more from all the art around the place.

Merle did the dishes, vacuumed, took out the garbage, but his real plan was to make supper.

As soon as T got up at about 3 pm, Merle asked what she liked to eat the most.

“I'm sure she's cool with it now, you don't have to cook.”

“I went into her work to apologize for ending up in her bed, and some little old man heard it, I really owe her.”

“Can you even cook? She's pretty picky about food.”

“I'm a pretty good cook actually. What does she like?”

“If you can make her a good medium rare medallion steak with mushrooms all will be forgiven.”

“Got it, I can do that.”

“I'm meeting a guy before work, and I'll arrange an interview for you tomorrow. It'll probably be taxiing equipment to and from the work site.”

“Thanks a lot.”

Merle went to the store and picked up the stuff to make everything right with his new landlady and got busy marinading the meat. Daryl was always eating out, but Merle liked to cook when he wasn't too tired.

By the time she came in from work he had everything clean and was serving up her food.

She walked into the kitchen looking very curious.

“What's going on?” she asked.

“I made you supper...for earlier...”

She came closer, peeling her jacket off her shoulders and he could tell by the look on her face that she liked the smell.

“That looks soooo good,” she moaned, eyeing up the food he was plating for her.

“I really didn't mean to make anything worse today.”

“I know that Merle, and I appreciated the effort.”

She sat down at the head of the table and watched him pour her a glass of wine and place the food in front of her.

Medallion steak, sauteed mushrooms and baked potato with everything on it, he was proud of how it turned out.

“So we can start fresh?” he asked.

“Of course. I really wasn't that mad in the first place. I think I have a bit of a reputation now, though,” she laughed. Her eyes squinted up at the corners when she laughed and he liked it, she was really pretty and thankfully forgiving too.

He laughed a little as well and picked up his plate of food to take back to his room.

“Where are you going?” she asked, laying her napkin across her lap.

“Gonna let you eat in peace. I'll come right back and get the dishes after.”

“Merle, come sit...I'd rather not eat such a nice meal alone.”

 

  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just one chapter today, I'm recovering from bronchitis. I'm so full of illness lately. LOL
> 
> thanks for reading, babes!!! Love you Teagan xoxo


	11. Chapter 11

_ **Dealbreaker 11** _

 

“What took you so long?” Phyllis called from the curb outside her house.

“I had to pick up the extra helmet, and I took a shower for ya.”

“I guess I'll let it slide then,” she said, pulling the helmet on and climbing on behind him.

“I know you just can't wait to get your legs around me,” he grinned.

“You should be so lucky. You couldn't handle me. I have experience on my side, honey,” she retorted.

Daryl laughed and leaned back against her for a second; he missed everything about her.

They made it to Louie's and got busy shooting some pool.

“I can't believe how much I miss that stupid place, but I needed to retire someday,” she mused.

“No, you don't. Come back, and we'll work you to death, the place isn't the same without you.”

“You'll manage. I'm glad Carol is happy there, she's a really good accountant.”

“Yeah, she's great.”

“So why can't you ask her out? You promised me a long story, remember?” she pressed.

“It's not that long I guess. Merle likes her so I can't do it.”

“Who does she like?”

“Me, I think.”

“I'm lost already, back up. What's the problem?”

“I can't do that to Merle...and it's probably better not to date someone I'm working with.”

“Do you really think he'd be mad about that?” she asked.

“Nope, that's the whole thing. He'd be all... _Merle_ about it. He'd be supportive of it, but I know he'd be hurt to see us together. I won't do that to him.”

“You two are so damned loyal, I've never seen anything like it,” she mused.

Nobody really understood the way they felt about each other, how could they?

Nobody was ever let in on the truth of their childhood. They never went anywhere without a shirt so they wouldn't have to explain it to anyone. They kept it just between the two of them and tried to leave it in the past, but that wasn't where it was staying.

“That's a shame; I'd actually love to see the two of you together. She had a hell of a time in Nova Scotia with the guy she dated there.”

“Oh yeah?”

“He was nuts. She went out with him for a few months and when she wanted to break it off, let's just say he wouldn't drop it. She ended up having to get a restraining order.”

“Jesus, what's with some people?” he asked.

“Who knows? I'd love her to be with someone I know is normal. She's such a sweet girl, but she has awful luck with men.”

“She already went out with a new guy from work who's a bit of a kook.”

“Damn it! She attracts some morons, the poor girl. I'd love to see her with you or Merle. You're both such good men. I can't believe either of you is single, never mind both of you.”

“It is what it is, I guess. Merle needs a nice woman, but I think he's kinda given up.

 

Hanging out with Phyllis is just what he needed, she was so easy to talk to. He made her promise not to disappear and meet him for pool again soon; it would be a long few months without Merle.

 

 

**#########################**

 

The next day at work Daryl called Merle to finally get more information out of him. He was starting his new job the next day and everything was fine. T's sister was nice, and he liked where he was staying. He didn't ask about Carol, but Daryl told him he'd seen Phyllis. He sounded happy to be away, and Daryl couldn't help feeling a touch of sadness that he felt so lost without Merle, but Merle sounded happier being away from him.

He got off the phone when Carol came in with some work for him.

“Hey, just need these signed.”

Carol placed the stack of papers on his desk and waited as he signed them.

“I saw your Aunt last night.”

“I know, she told me.”

“What else did she tell you?”

Daryl was a little afraid Phyllis would tell her what he said about the whole Merle situation, but on second thought he knew she probably wouldn't say anything.

Carol looked at him like she had no idea what he could be referring to.

“Nothing, was she supposed to?”

“No, no...I was wondering actually. Is Shane still bothering you?”

“He's OK, I think. He just gives me the evil eye every time I speak to Oscar. Some men never grow up.”

“That's true. Tell me if he's causing you any problems and I'll take care of it.”

“OK, thanks.”

She collected the papers and went back to her desk. Daryl wished the situation wasn't what it was but there was no way out of it, she was off limits to him. He'd be stuck staring at her all day, wanting to talk to her, touch her and take her home. He hated that it had to be this way.

 

**#########################**

 

That night Daryl tried somewhere new to eat. Louie's wasn't any fun without Merle or Phyllis. He picked a little Irish pub called Bobby's Place and drank a Guinness while watching some guys play darts. The walls were dark wood and wine red panels; it looked like he'd stepped through a time warp to 100 years ago. A couple in the corner were making out pretty heavy for a public place, but he couldn't seem to take his eyes off of them.

It was dark enough they'd never notice him staring, so he let himself do it. The man held the woman's face in his hands and was plundering her mouth his tongue. This guy was gonna be getting some love later for certain; it was hot like fire. The woman's hand was, not so discreetly, creeping up his thigh and Daryl looked around to see if anyone else was noticing. Nobody seemed to be able to see them but him, almost like they were ghosts only visible to him.

Daryl tried not to imagine kissing Carol like that, but he couldn't get it out of his mind. He imagined his hand on the back of her slender neck, pulling her closer to his mouth. He shuddered and nodded to the bartender that he needed another drink and she nodded back with a smirk. Apparently, his staring had been observed after all, but he was only human. He could sense the intensity between this couple, and he wanted it too. He felt lonely sometimes, even with Merle around but he couldn't imagine having someone to come home to every night, or someone marry and have children with if Merle didn't.

There was no way around it; he owed him too much to leave him alone in the world.

 

That night he got home and the place was desolate, he poured himself into bed and knew he had to do something about his life. Something had to give.

 

 

 


	12. Chapter 12

_ **Dealbreaker 12** _

 

Merle fell into a nice routine over the next couple of days and was finally starting to think of Carol a bit less. He was taking equipment back and forth all day, up and down the same route and it was monotonous but easy. He worked from 7 am to 5 pm, and T was usually working 9 pm to 7 am, but he spent a lot of evenings in the gym as well.

Jacqui wasn't upset at all anymore, and they had a friendly relationship going on. He found himself asking her about all the nick nacks in her house, and she had a great story to go with every little thing she'd collected. She had been married to a hospital administrator, but she was a widow now after her husband died of cancer three years before. Their passion had been travel, and they'd gone to so many places Merle had never dreamed of going.

“Where's the best place you've been?” he asked.

“The best....” She was clearly trying to think of the truest answer for him. “Honestly, I really loved Germany. The beer, the food, and the people were amazing...I just had a great time there.”

“German beer is good,” he agreed. “I never been anywhere outside of Canada before.”

“I'd recommend traveling a bit if you can. Going to other countries is like being on a different planet sometimes. It's amazing what you can experience when you completely immerse yourself in another culture.”

“Maybe I will then. I'd go to Scotland if I wasn't so scared of flying.”

“It's really not that bad, seriously. I was scared in the beginning too, but there's a trick to it.”

“Alright then, tell me the secret,” he grinned.

“When the flight attendant comes by with the cart and offers you a drink you ask for as many as they'll let you have...or bring some Xanax,” she laughed.

“That sounds like the easiest option, cause I'd be like a cat climbing the curtains.”

Having somebody to talk to was nice, and she loved to talk, he could tell by how much she did it. Merle could ask her one question, and it would turn into a story, but they were great funny stories.

She made him lunch every day even though he said he could do it himself and he wondered if this is what married life was like if it was, then he wanted it even more now. Merle had never lived in a house with a woman, but he liked it already.

 

**############################**

 

The snow came down heavy overnight, and Daryl took Merle's Challenger to work and parked his bike for the winter.

Shane seemed to be behaving himself and was bragging about having a new woman already. Daryl assumed he was just trying to save face and wasn't too surprised.

The only answer for Daryl seemed to be finding someone else to focus on cause he wasn't going for Carol no matter how much he wanted to.

He settled on calling a woman he dated the year before. It hadn't ended too badly; they just stopped calling each other.

He sat at his desk and had to look up her number online cause it wasn't in his phone anymore.

“Hello?” Justine's voice came over the line, and he really considered hanging up.

“Hi, I know we haven't spoken in a while, but it's Daryl.”

“Who?”

“Uh...Daryl Dixon?”

“Oh, hi! Sorry I just couldn't hear you that well.”

“So how are you doing these days?” he asked although he only sort of cared.

“I'm OK. Busy with work and stuff. You?”

“Pretty good. I was wondering if I could take you out for a drink or something.”

“Uh....yeah. Sure, when?”

“Tonight?”

“Not Louie's though.”

“Nope. Somewhere else.”

Justine never liked Louie's or anything else he liked for that matter; he already regretted calling her.

 

Later that day Carol was kidding around with the guys at the front and laughing her head off at a dirty joke Axel was telling. She fit in perfectly with the place. She was one of them, just like Phyllis had been. She wasn't pretentious or overly serious. He wondered where he could find someone exactly like her but not her, but he knew she was one of a kind and that looking would be pointless.

She seemed to have gotten over him turning her down and was acting casual again, and he almost missed her looking sad about it. She was obviously over it and doing fine now, at least that's how it looked to him.

“Hey, Daryl. I need the day off work tomorrow, is that alright?”

She called back to him from her desk, littered with men who should be working and not fawning over her. She was the flower covered in bees, and he felt jealous, but she wasn't his.

“Sure, no problem.”

“Thanks a lot. I have to get my wisdom teeth pulled,” she groaned.

“Ouch. You still have wisdom teeth?”

“Not for long. I need to have my aunt drive me home too cause they're giving me drugs. One of them is hurting like hell, and I was lucky to get in, they had a cancellation, otherwise I'd have to wait another month!”

“Just let me know how much time you need off to recover, and you got it,” he offered.

“Thanks, Daryl.”

 

 

**############################**

 

Daryl picked up Justine at her apartment that evening and promised himself he'd try to see the best in the situation. He took her to a nice lounge for drinks, and she talked about her job and her yoga classes and her toy poodle, and he wanted to kill himself within half an hour.

He nodded at all the appropriate times and asked questions that seemed reasonable, but he knew he'd made a mistake calling her. He wasn't the type to mess with someone's feelings, but he thought if he tried hard enough he could make himself interested, it wasn't true. There was nothing all that wrong with her, she was smart and pretty but stuck up to a fault. Nobody was perfect, and he knew he had flaws as well, but after an awkward hug goodnight, he knew he wouldn't be calling her back.

 

He talked to Merle later and told him he'd gone on a date. Merle sounded surprised to hear that is was Justine and asked how that had come about.

“I just called her...maybe I'll call her again, who knows?”

He was trying hard to prove to Merle that he didn't want Carol but he couldn't lie to himself half as easily.

“How's Carol?” Merle asked finally.

“Good, I guess. She's off tomorrow for some dental thing.”

“Is Shane behaving himself?”

“Yeah, he seems to be. Is the job up there good?”

“Boring as fuck but I've been hanging out with T and his sister, she's great.”

“That's good.”

Merle sounded happy, and Daryl was glad, but he wanted his life back. He wanted Louie's after work, Merle singing in the basement and Tim Horton's drive thru in the mornings.

 

**###########################**

 

Daryl was surprised to see Carol's car in the parking lot in the morning and asked her why she wasn't at the dentist.

“I'm going to have to call and cancel; my aunt is sick in bed. I wanted to get it done, but I'm not taking a cab home when I'm drugged,” she laughed.

“I can drive you home,” he offered before putting even an ounce of thought into it.

“What about work?”

“It's no problem. I can leave Oscar in charge for a day; it's been slow this week anyway. You don't want to have to wait a month with a sore tooth.”

“It's not just a ride home, though; I also need someone to take care of me for the day. I'm going to be a mess, Daryl.”

Merle or no Merle he wasn't going to make her suffer for a month in pain when he could help her.

“I'll drive and take care of you; I want to. When is it?”

“I need to be there at 9:30, so I'd have to get going now to make it in time.”

“Alright, I'll just tell Oscar, and I'll meet you in Merle's car.”

“Are you sure about this, it'll take up a lot of your time?”

“I want to, Carol...I'm sure.”

He smiled and walked into work to talk to Oscar, wondering what the hell he was thinking to volunteer to babysit a stoned Carol. He was getting weak though and couldn't resist getting to be with her all day and be helpful to her.

 

When they got to the dentist office, she looked like she was starting to get nervous and he tried to be comforting.

“It'll be OK, I had this done but I wasn't high, I was wide awake, so it'll be better for you,” he said, trying to sound as encouraging as he could.

“Does it hurt a lot after?” she asked.

“Uh....no?”

“Stop lying.”

“Yeah, it hurt like a motherfucker actually.”

“Damn it,” she whined. “If I act stupid when I'm drugged just ignore me, OK?”

“Nope. I'm recording it for Youtube; those videos are gold!”

“That's it; I'm calling a cab.”

“Carol, I'd never do that. I'm just trying to make you laugh.”

She took a deep breath and let it out slow.

“I won't be that goofy, will I? I always thought people were putting that on a little for comedic effect.”

“Nope, you'll probably be pretty loopy,” he informed her.

“Damn it!”

“Carol.....Carol.....”

The receptionist looked around the office and called for her, but Carol was lost in her thoughts.

“She's right here,” Daryl called. “Carol, they're ready for you.”

“I can't do this; they said I'll need stitches...in my gums!”

“It's not that bad; you're gonna be OK.”

“OK.”

She got up and left with the woman, but she didn't look OK at all.  
He played games on his phone and read some women's magazines, becoming bored out of his skull waiting until a hygienist came to get him over an hour later.

“She's all done. You're driving her home?”

“Yep.”

He followed her to a white room where Carol appeared to be sleeping. Her mouth was stuffed with gauze, and she was drooling onto the dentist chair, but somehow she still looked really pretty.

“Carol,” the hygienist said, shaking her shoulder.

Carol moaned and wiped her face with the sleeve of her shirt.

“She shouldn't be alone until she's lucid and she should probably go straight to bed,” he was informed. “These are for pain and here's a list of dos and don'ts for her. If you have questions, you can just call. OK?”

He took all the things he was handed and then looked at Carol who appeared to be sleeping again.

“How do I get her in my car?”

They got her on her feet, and she mumbled a lot of gibberish along the way. He had to put on her seat belt for her, and she bumped her head on the window when he turned a corner.

“Jesus! I'm sorry!” he stuttered, pulling her up straight and then she flopped against his shoulder.

He got her home in one piece and had to dig in her purse to find her keys. Carol was groggy, and he wrapped her arm around his shoulder to get her to her bed.

She sat on the edge and looked up at his face, she was completely out of it and grinning. She tried to speak with the gauze in her mouth.

It only just kinda sounded like words, but it seemed like she was asking if she looked stupid.

“No, you look pretty even with your cheeks packed like a hamster,” he grinned.

“Good,” she said, sounding relieved.

He took her shoes off her feet and pulled the blanket over top of her. She looked really cute actually. He realized he'd rather look at her swollen face and listen to her gibberish than spend even 5 minutes with Justine or anyone else. Daryl wanted to be the one to make her feel better every time she needed it. What he really wanted was to lay down beside her and just hold her as she slept. He was in deep, and it was painfully obvious. He sat on her couch for a little bit and started to worry that she might choke on the gauze in her mouth. He looked through the info the dentist gave him, and it didn't say anything about it so he called to ask and they said she should be fine but to keep checking on her.

Daryl checked on her every 10 minutes, and she didn't move an inch all morning until about noon when he heard her trying to get up.

He went to check that she was OK and that she didn't fall on her face.

“I need to pee,” she slurred.

“Come on,” he said, walking her to the bathroom.

“Why are you here?” she asked, looking up at his face. A piece of the gauze had fallen out, so she was speaking a little better.

“I'm just staying to make sure you're OK.”

“Why wouldn't I be?”

“You had your wisdom teeth pulled, and you're on drugs.”

“Oh right! Duh.”

She went to the bathroom and then complained that she was hungry. Daryl made her a smoothie out of yogurt and frozen fruit from her freezer, and she raved like it was the best thing she'd ever had. He didn't cook much, but he could operate a blender. She drank the smoothie and laughed at her own inability to use a straw. He could watch her being goofy forever, it was great. She wouldn't be so happy when the drugs wore off and the pain set in, but for now, it was nice.

 

He wound up staying all day until she started making sense but he tucked her in first.

“Sorry, this took up your whole day. I'm sure this is more than you normally do for an employee.”

“I actually had a really great day with you...you're not just an employee.”

She was looking up at him from her bed, smiling that sweet smile and now that she was lucid he couldn't help thinking of kissing her again.

He smiled instead and left before he did anything he couldn't take back but nothing about it felt good, in fact, it hurt like hell. Daryl knew in his heart that he should be laying next to her and holding her in his arms, but he was bound by his conscience.

 

 

 


	13. Chapter 13

_ **Dealbreaker 13** _

 

Merle was working hard and enjoying being in a new place. He was starting to feel like he could start over.

With the first week over he was excited to hear he'd be getting the next 2 days off, he didn't feel like going to the bar though. Merle really wasn't sure what to do with himself so he ended up just playing music in his bedroom after supper and relaxing.

T was at the gym and then heading off to work his usual graveyard shift after sleeping most of the day. He was always working out, and it showed. T didn't drink very much and chose to spend most of his time working or lifting weights.

When Merle came out to grab a drink from the kitchen, he found Jacqui crouched down and looking under the sink.

“What 'cha doin'?” he asked playfully.

“It's dripping under here...I'll have to call a plumber.”

“A plumber? Pfft! Lemme have a look,” he insisted, laying down and shifting under the sink to see. He shut off the water under the sink and grabbed a bucket to disconnect the pipe. In no time he had the minor problem diagnosed.

“Just needs a new washer, I'll be right back.”

“Oh,” she answered as he got up and started heading to the door. Jacqui grabbed her purse and pulled her wallet out. “How much will it cost?”

He smiled at her and shook his head.

“Less than five bucks, I got it.”

Merle ran to the hardware store, picked up the washer and was back in 10 minutes. Everything in town was close since she lived on main street, it was a great location. He put the sink back together and ran some water to make sure it was fixed.

“There ya go,” he said, grabbing a drink.

“Thank you so much, Merle.”

“No problem. May as well make myself useful while I'm here,” he laughed.

He turned to leave the room, and she noticed a stain on his shirt from spilled powdered soap under the sink.

“Just wait a minute. Your shirt...it got dirty from under the sink.”

She brushed her hand over his back.

“It's not coming out,” she sighed. “Take it off, and I'll wash it for you.”

He peeled his shirt off and handed it to her and said thanks. Merle never went without an undershirt but he still headed straight back to his room to get another shirt to wear over it.

“Merle?” she called after him.

“Yeah?”

“Did you maybe want to watch a movie tonight?”

Merle found the offer unusual but he liked the sound of it, he definitely had no other plans.

“Yeah, sure.”

They ended up on the couch together an hour later with a bowl of popcorn between them.

“T's been pestering me to watch this movie for ages, but he knows I don't like scary movies. I didn't want to watch it alone.”

“What's it about?” Merle asked as the movie started to play.

“A haunted house, I think.”

“Awwww you scared of ghosts?” he teased.

“Maybe...when I'm alone. This is an old house, and it makes scary noises sometimes.”

“That's adorable,” he smirked.

“Shut up!” she answered, leaning over to push his shoulder from the other side of the couch.

He smiled at her and rolled his eyes.

“Don't worry; I won't let any ghosts get ya.”

He was really surprised anyone would be afraid of The Amityville Horror remake, but here she was.

They watched the movie for a while, and she was sat clinging to a big pillow in her lap and he couldn't take how cute she looked. The movie wasn't even that scary and she was clearly terrified.

“You alright?”

“Uh huh,” she said, staring wide-eyed at the screen.

“We could watch something else if you want.”

“No...I'm OK, I can do it,” she answered.

They shared an uncomfortable moment during a sex scene and tried not to make eye contact.

Ryan Reynolds was being ridden by his wife in the movie, and they were trying to pretend it wasn't sexy as hell, but it wasn't easy.

“Good lord,” she uttered under her breath.

“Yeah...you can say that again.”

They made it through the movie, and she poured them both a glass of wine.

“Thanks, Jacqui.”

“Please be sure to tell T that I made it all the way through the movie and I wasn't scared at all, OK?”

“You were scared, but I'll tell him you weren't, no worries,” he laughed.

She took a sip of her drink and looked at him more seriously for a moment.

“Merle, can I ask you something?”

“Go ahead.”

“Just tell me to mind my own business but...what happened to your back?”

Apparently, she could see the marks through his washed out undershirt. After all the years he spent thinking he was hiding it, he wondered why she was the first to say anything.

“Just scars, it's not really a nice story.”

“I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked.”

“No, it's OK. Just not the kind of thing you'd want to hear about, that's all.”

“An accident?” she asked.

Her eyes made him want to tell her and he couldn't explain it cause he's never wanted to tell anyone before. She had kind eyes, her whole face was full of warmth and he couldn't resist it.

“It was no accident....my father did that.”

She said nothing, she just moved her hand slowly toward his across the couch, and he dropped his head to look at her hand touching his own.

There was a split second where he was worried he might cry but it soon passed. It felt like a huge weight being lifted simply being able to tell someone.

“I'm so sorry,” she said finally.

“It's fine, I just never told anyone that and it happened a million years ago. I didn't think anyone could see it through my undershirt,” he chuckled softly.

“That must have been awful; I'm sorry it happened to you.”

“It happened to my little brother too.”

“I feel bad saying anything about it now.”

“Don't feel bad, it's actually kind of freeing to say it out loud. I just never wanted to burden anyone with it.”

“It's no burden to me. I'm happy to listen to anything you want to talk about,” she insisted.

“But you don't even know me.”

“Merle, this is how I can get to know you....right?”

He realized she was absolutely right. If he never shared who he was or what he'd been through with people they'd never really get to know him. Merle didn't want to bring other people down, people who'd had nice childhoods, but he could tell she wanted to know.

Over a few more glasses of wine, he unloaded his entire childhood from off of his shoulders, and she listened intently to every word. Once he got going, he couldn't stop himself. He'd been holding in the pain since the first time he'd been hit and the more he told her the better he felt.

“You're both very strong to have survived that and made such a success of your life,” she said when he was finally done.

“There's a lot more I wanted to do, but it definitely could have turned out worse, that's for sure.”

“What else did you want?” she asked.

Merle looked up at her face, and her eyes pulled even more out of him.

“I wanted to get married and have a family, but it just didn't turn out that way.”

“It could still happen, Merle.”

“It's a bit late now...but maybe.”

“Don't lose hope. You never know when you might find someone...they could be right in front of you.”

Merle couldn't tear his eyes away from her and it felt like everything in his periphery had become foggy.

“Jacqui...”

“Yes?”

“Am I just dreaming...or can you feel this too?”

She said nothing but slid over to him on the couch, moving to popcorn bowl to the table.

“Merle, can I kiss you?”

“...hell yes.”

He closed his eyes as she came closer, feeling a little like the woman to be approached this way. He'd never had a woman ask to kiss him; he'd never even heard of such a thing.

Her lips touched his and he knew it was different than any other kiss he'd experienced. She knew everything that was inside him. He told her about all the pain and misery and she still wanted to be close to him. All the things he thought he had to hide didn't scare her away, it seemed to draw her closer.

He dared to touch her shoulder, and the kiss changed as she turned her head and kissed him deeper.

Merle hadn't bothered to believe they could be together. After his past with women and how things had panned out with Carol he hadn't let his mind go there. He just liked her company and listening to her stories without thinking she could ever be his. She was obviously beautiful but he hadn't even let himself want her, not after everything, and yet here she was...choosing him.

There was a pause in the kiss where they looked into each other's eyes, and she smiled.

“You're a good kisser,” she grinned.

“I am?”

“Oh yes.”

She pulled his mouth to hers again, and for the next half hour they just kissed, and she sank into his arms. Nothing so sweet and wonderful had ever happened to him. Apparently, there was hope after all.

 

**###############################**

 

**Ok, I just want to explain why I had her ask to kiss him just in case it came across as kind of submissive, that was NOT the intention. Jacqui has just listened to Merle describe his entire childhood of abuse in great detail and I wanted to have her ask, just as a sign of respecting his potential boundaries. Just like if I wrote a woman describing abuse this way I would have a man be extra careful in approaching them immediately after or especially for the first time. It's intended to be sweet and romantic that she chooses to be this way with him. Merle had kept the secret of abuse all his life so she is just being kind.**

**Also I think it's nice for Merle, after having experienced rejection so many times, to have a beautiful woman make the first move and I think having a woman ask this would be very exciting for Merle and kind of blow his mind. I just wanted to clarify why I chose to write it this way.**

**I understand they may seem like an odd pairing based on the brief time they interact on the show. Jacqui (very rightfully) dislikes the Merle represented on the show but that is not how I write him here at all. I just love Merle (who he was becoming right before he died) and I also love Jacqui from the show so I wanted to try pairing them. I'll never forget how tough and smart Jacqui was but also the tender kiss and goodbye she offers Jim before they leave him by the side of the road, it was SO beautifully acted it tore my heart out. In this AU world Merle chose to deal with the abuse differently than Merle on the show and based on the way I've written him I think it's appropriate for them to be together but I wouldn't ship them based on the early show version of Merle, if that makes sense.**

**Thanks for reading! Love ya, Teagan Xoxo**

 

 

 


	14. Chapter 14

_ **Dealbreaker 14** _

Merle was sitting on the couch next to Jacqui as she read the morning paper and drank her tea. The night before had been one of the most amazing of his life. He felt wanted and appreciated and it was overwhelming. He didn't feel any need to rush anything till she was ready and they had kept it to kissing, but it was nothing short of perfection for him. She told to him that she hadn't kissed anyone since her husband and it was a big thing for her. Being the first person, she wanted to be close to after her husband made him feel incredible and he had to keep reminding himself it had happened.

T was home after his night shift and sleeping upstairs, and they decided to leave it a day or two to talk to him about them being together since it had happened so fast. Jacqui just wanted a day or two before telling him.

Merle watched her cause he couldn't help it, she was so gorgeous. Every once in a while she'd look up and see him watching her, and she'd grin and look down at her paper again.

Jacqui lay back then, rested her head on the arm of the couch and stretched her legs across his lap suddenly and he grinned, he liked this more all the time. She kept the paper in front of her face, and he lay his hands on her calves trying to remain a gentleman.

She was too clever, beautiful and classy for words. The way she stretched out her legs and lay them so slowly over his lap almost killed him. He didn't know what the hell was wrong with this lady's eyesight, but he was happy to be of any interest to her.

“You know,” she began, “it's been probably three and a half years for me...”

Merle looked over when she spoke, but she was still hiding her face behind the paper. He had a pretty good idea what she meant, but he had to be sure before he put his foot in his mouth.

“Since....”

She folded the paper and tossed it on the table and lay back again, just looking at him for a moment.

“It's been almost three and a half years since I had sex.”

Part of him wanted to play coy while the other half wanted to take her right there. She looked like she was starving for it and he was dismayed why she was looking at him the way she was.

“That's a long time...been a while for me too.”

“We'll be alone tonight when my brother goes to work,” she said with a suggestive lilt to her voice.

He couldn't not grin at her words. He covered his mouth with his hand for a second and just looked at her. 

“You're absolutely right; we'll be here alone.”

It was such a little cat and mouse, push and pull, tease and withdraw that it was making him crazy.

“I really like you, Merle. I feel like we compliment each other.”

“Me too.”

“I think you're really sexy too,” she said, without the hint of bashfulness.

“Seriously?”

“Oh yes.”

“I think you're gorgeous, Jacqui...are your eyes alright, though?” he tried to joke.

“I never thought I'd want to be with anyone else after Sam died, but I think we could work.”

Merle was speechless. He just looked at her beautiful face like if he stared at her long enough, it might start to make sense. She was so forward, and he loved not sitting in the dark wondering where he stood.

“Why me?” he uttered looking down at her legs in his lap.

“It's a bunch of little reasons, but I trust my intuition about you.”

He shrugged like she must be out of her mind.

“Don't believe me?” she asked.

“It's not that; I just don't understand it...I've been turned down quite a bit.”

She smiled, and he waited for her to explain it all to him.

“You came here so sad and hurt, but the moment you felt you'd offended me you made it your business to make it right. You listened to every story I told you without interrupting...even Sam didn't do that. Then you shared with me something personal that you never told anyone before. I don't know you very well but I have a good feeling about this, and I really hope you do too.”

Merle shook his head and smiled in disbelief.

“You can't be real...you can't be.”

He lay down over her and kissed her nice and slow. She moaned against his lips, and he was in heaven right there on earth.

She paused for just a moment and looked at his eyes.

“So...tonight?”

“Anything you want, Jacqui, anything at all...”

 

**########################**

 

Phyllis stopped by Carol's house the next day to check on her. Daryl insisted she take a couple of days off with pay to recover and she took him up on it because she still felt rough.

“Here, honey.”

Phyllis brought her a MacDonald's milkshake and plopped down on the couch.

“Thanks,” Carol croaked. Her throat was swollen and sore, and she felt like death.

“I'm so sorry about being sick yesterday; it just came out of nowhere.”

“Don't worry about it, Daryl stayed. I felt like a complete twit getting so much help from a man who turned me down but I needed somebody, I was a mess.”

“You asked him out?”

Phyllis knew Daryl had said she liked him, but she didn't know he'd turned her down. His loyalty to Merle was confusing, and she wanted to get to the bottom of it.

“I just asked him to that steak night thing; it's no big deal. I'm just not his type I guess, he just seemed really nice,” she sighed.

“He is. It's a little more complicated than you know but...never mind.”

“What?”

“Nothing, I just think I need to give Merle a call when I get home.”

“I miss Merle around work; I hope he's happy up there.”

“Me too. Merle is about as sweet as men get, they both are, but they sure did make a mess of things.”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing, babe, just thinking out loud.”

Phyllis made Carol some soup and tidied up her house then left when Carol went to bed. She had to clean up another kind of mess.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	15. Chapter 15

_ **Dealbreaker 15** _

 

T didn't go to the gym that evening before work and Merle, and Jacqui exchanged frustrated looks over supper, they were getting impatient. He was up in his room talking to his girlfriend and blasting Ashanti so loud the lyrics were permeating the whole house.

 

 _ **Can you rock with me?**_  
_**Non-stop with me?**_  
_**Can you take it to the top with me?**_  
_**I just wanna love you, baby**_  
_**Always thinking of you babe**_

 _ **Can you roll with me?**_  
_**All over me?**_  
_**Can you take control of me?**_  
_**I just wanna love you, baby**_  
_**Always thinking of you baby**_

_**I think I like how your body feels next to me  
Aw baby when you kissing me,** _

_**aw baby when you loving me  
I can't describe what I want to do to you tonight** _

_**Aw baby when you come to me,** _

_**I'll make it, so you'll never leave** _

 

T wandered downstairs, and they tried hard to look casual. Merle figured they might as well tell him sooner than later, but she wanted to wait until the next day.

“What's up with you two? you're looking all...weird,” he asked, noticing the tension.

“Nothing at all, everything's fine,” she insisted.

When T left for work, and they were finally alone, Merle could feel the anticipation rising. The air was thick with sexual tension, and Jacqui took a shower, just to make him wait a little more. The door was open just a crack, and sweet smelling steam was seeping through into the living room.

Merle sat on the couch, not believing how good life could suddenly be. His phone rang, but he couldn't be bothered with anything but her right then so he turned it off without even looking at it.

When she appeared in the living room, she blew him away completely.

He was sat on her couch in just his jeans and a t-shirt, but she was standing right in front of his face in a dark blue silky nightgown that went down to her ankles but showed every single curve of her body. The thin straps showed her perfect shoulders and arms, and he felt like he should be pinching himself, this had to be a dream.

“Just look at you, honey,” he uttered.

“Is it OK?” she asked.

“There's nowhere I don't want to kiss you right now...you're perfect. Sorry...you make me say too much,” he sighed.

“I make you?”

“It's those eyes I think. I just look at you, and I wanna tell you everything.”

“Tell me what you want, Merle.”

“Honestly?”

“Yes...tell me.”

“I wanna make love to you over and over again for the rest of my life.”

“Come,” she said, beckoning him to follow.

Next thing he knew he was laying next to her on her bed and she was kissing him softly. The lamp next to the bed was dimly lighting the scene, and he was expecting her to turn it off, but she never did.

Merle couldn't think of a single person he'd rather be with; she had him already. Being in her arms and trailing his thirsty tongue all over her neck and shoulder was the ultimate high.

“I wanna make nice, slow love to you, Jacqui,” he growled.

Her eyes rolled back in her head, and a devilish grin took over her features.

“Congratulations, that's the sexiest thing a man's ever said to me.”

He sucked gently at the skin just below her ear, and she ran her fingers through his short hair.

Her body was wrapped in smooth, cool silk and he ran his hands all over the material teasing himself and imagining her bare skin. He listened to her closely, to the sounds she made...learning her.

“I'm a little nervous,” she confessed.

“I'm way more than a little nervous,” he chuckled. “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I really want to it's just been a long time.”

“Just tell me if you don't like something or if you want to stop.”

“Thanks, come here,” she grinned.

 

She wanted this, but it was still new again after going so long without. He planned to do right by her.

His hand moved down her body to her knee, where her nightgown was not covering her skin, to test the waters.

She grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt and pulled him closer before yanking the shirt over his head.

“You look so good!” she moaned.

She rolled him onto his back and knelt down for a moment next to him before pulling her nightgown slowly over her head. She looked only a tiny bit shy, but she took his breath away.

“You're so beautiful,” he sighed.

The sight of her in only her blue silk panties was the hottest thing he'd ever seen.

She came down over him and kissed his lips, and he held her so gently. She was precious and not to be treated roughly; he wouldn't dare do that.

She kissed his chest and neck and drove him right out of his mind with need. With her knees on either side of his right thigh, she ground herself slow and smooth against his leg.

After a minute she turned onto her back and pulled him over her.

His kisses moved further down her body, and he licked at her right nipple trying to gauge how she liked to be touched.

They were both panting heavily as the heat increased.

She seemed to like it soft, so he kept it up, teasing his lips over both of her nipples and all over her breasts.

“You're the devil,” she moaned.

He wanted, more than anything, to make her feel good so he shifted his attention to her belly. He made the slow, teasing journey from between her breasts to her navel and then just above where she needed it.

His hands drifted up to graze his fingertips over her nipples as he squirmed down to press his lips to her wet panties.

“Mmmm.....” she moaned, holding her hand to her forehead like she had a fever.

He took hold of her panties and slid them down her perfect legs, slow enough to make her want it faster.

The light was good, and she seemed to be feeling more confident. He unbuckled his belt as his eyes stayed focused on hers.

“Take off all your clothes, I want to see your body,” she groaned.

Sex, for him, was normally quick and in the dark and then putting on a shirt right after to avoid an awkward conversation.

He backed off the bed to take off his pants and boxers, and she crawled closer to kiss him again, kneeling at the very edge of the bed. His hands took her ass as he bit gently at her throat and she was melting into him completely.

“Touch me,” she purred softly.

He kissed her neck and ran his hand up her inner thigh as she knelt right at the edge of the bed. When he finally touched her, she let out a whimper against his neck, and he loved it. He continued to tease her and touch, bringing her closer and closer to where she really wanted to go. She was warm and wet and leaning her face against his chest just taking in the sensation of his hand between her legs.

She kissed his chest and ran her hands down his back over his scars. He didn't have anything to hide, and it felt so good, she wanted him exactly as he was.

“I want it,” she hissed, taking his rock hard dick in her hand and jerking him off slow and steady.

“I wanna give it to you, but there's something I wanna do for you first.”

“Mmmm....I like the sound of that.”

“Good, then lay back, honey.”

She squealed a little, and he found it adorable as she lay back with her head on the pillow and crossed her ankles to tease him. She looked all coy, just smirking at him with her head resting on the pillow. She made sex fun and still so romantic. He didn't have to wonder how she was feeling cause she never stopped smiling or giving him that look, the one that said she cared about him. Almost strangers still but he already cared for her so much, and he knew she felt it too.

“No way....open up for me, you won't be sorry.”

“Jesus!” she moaned. “I love you talking dirty.”

Merle got down on all fours and crawled toward her spreading legs like approaching the gates of heaven.

“Now, that's a fucking beautiful sight!”

“Oh yeah?” she asked. “Like what you see?”

His fingertips trailed down from her knee to her pussy, and she let her head push back into the pillow. Slow and wet and skilled, he left her desperate for more. He needed to taste her so bad, and she was already so close to the edge, he could just feel it.

The electricity in the room was at such a high level he knew it was as hot as it could get. They were on the exact same page and ready to burn the whole book.

He ran his muscular arms under her thighs, and she let her legs lay open for his next onslaught.

He teased her with his hot tongue and then kissed her inner thigh making her cry out for more.

“Do it....please do it, baby....”

He closed his lips over her clit and touched her entrance with just a hint of pressure.

“Please!”

With that, he tilted his head to the side and lapped at her pussy like he was dying and only she could quench his thirst.

After a couple of minutes, she hit that peak, and he pushed his fingers slowly inside her to feel it as she came undone.

“Fuuuuuck.....Mmmm.....Damn it!”

He eased off gradually, and she looked spent and completely satisfied. She didn't move for a whole minute, and he just watched her, feeling proud to have made her feel good.

By the time she opened her eyes again he was stunned to see her getting on her knees to take him deep into her mouth. Nothing ever felt as right as her touch. As good as it felt physically, though, he just needed to be near her. She had such power over him, but he was happy to submit to it.

He tried to hold it in; he didn't want to cum before getting to be inside her.

“Jacqui....wait....” he groaned.

She knew just what he meant so she grabbed a condom from her nightstand and handed it to him.

“Never thought I'd need these again. Thank God they're not expired.”

She lay back, and his eyes drifted over her body as he rolled the condom down his dick.

He crawled over her, and she brought her feet up to rest on the middle of his back and took his face in her hands.

He wasn't a second or third choice for her. After losing her husband and spending three years alone, she wanted to be with him.

Merle looked down at her face, and she was smiling up at him, her pretty eyes squinting, and he could hardly believe it.

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

He held her face and kissed her lips, forehead, and neck before entering her gently.

“Oh yeah....that's...Mmmm...” she groaned.

He thrust into her like a gentleman, trying to read her and get a feel for what she wanted and how she wanted it. In no time she was asking for it a little bit harder, and he couldn't wait to let it go a bit more.

He pulled her leg up around his waist and held it there, fucking her harder as she almost sobbed with satisfaction.

“You fuck me so good, baby...” she cried, reaching down to take his ass with her greedy hands. She pulled him deeper into her and arched her back.

“Do I give you what you need, honey?”

“Uh huh,” she panted. “Don't stop...please....”

He moved into her, and she looked right into his eyes.

“I didn't even know I could be this happy,” he whispered.

It went on for almost ten minutes, and he was blown away to have lasted so long after going so long without it.

He was right there, and he knew it was going to be explosive. She was making little, desperate, whimpering sounds and it was so sexy.

Then it hit, and it was powerful like waves crashing on rocks.

He couldn't even form words, he just groaned and growled and held her head in his arm pressing his lips to her forehead.

Merle felt like he'd just run up 30 flights of stairs and he collapsed beside her, gasping for air. He still needed her close, so he pulled her into his arms hoping and praying she liked to cuddle. The smell of her skin and everything about her...he just needed her close.

She didn't object, and he was glad.

“You alright, honey?” he asked finally.

“I'm so good, you have no idea,” she answered, and she sounded so happy it put his mind right at ease.

Jacqui laced her fingers with his and snuggled her face into his neck.

“I could get used to this,” he chuckled contently.

“Merle? Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Have you...ever been in an interracial relationship?”

“No, but not for lack of trying. I've asked out and been turned down by a lot of different women,” he laughed.

She laughed too, and he kissed her shoulder, leaning over her again to look down at her face.

“That's not a problem, is it? Cause I really want to be with you...if that's what you want.”

“It's not a problem for me, I was just curious,” she smiled, touching his face.

“Thank God,” he sighed, laying down beside her again. “Do you think T will be upset about you being with one of his friends?”

“I don't think so. He's been raving about you since you hired him at Auto Graveyard.”

“I never would have guessed I'd end up here after the horrible first impression I made on you.”

“We've all had our low moments,” she laughed.

“Well, this is about the highest moment I ever had,” he sighed.

“Things can always turn around, Merle, remember that,” she said softly, pulling him closer.

**############################**

**I was listening to Ashanti over and over while writing this, so I had to put that song in this chapter. Lol, It's one of my favorite songs on my smut playlist. I love writing these two together:) I saw a really cute picture of Michael Rooker and** **Jeryl Prescott, and I was like Awwwww! They actually looked really cute together.**

**Hope you liked it. Caryl stuff is coming next;)**

**I'm posting the end of the story tomorrow. It's 2-3 chapters or so. Love ya, Teagan.xoxo**

 


	16. Chapter 16

**_ Dealbreaker 16 _ **

 

Merle woke up in Jacqui's arms, and he never loved life more. She opened her eyes not long after he woke up and smiled at him, it was still very early, and he knew he should get back to his room since they hadn't spoken to T yet.

He kissed her softly, and she appeared to be contented.

“So, do you still want me today?” he asked.

“Even more than yesterday.”

He dropped his head to her chest, still blown away by her feelings for him.

Eventually, he made it back to his room and T came home. He hoped it would go well with telling him, but he'd risk anything, do anything, to be with her even if it meant upsetting his friend.

 

The phone rang, and he was a little surprised to be getting a call from Phyllis, surely she knew he was working away by now.

“Phyllis?” he answered groggily.

“Hey, you! How are ya?”

“Amazing.”

It was the truth; he felt completely amazing.

“That's funny. The last I heard you were a little.....devastated.”

“Not anymore, I ain't. I met the most incredible woman, and she fuckin' likes me! She's so beautiful and smart, and she's been all over the world, and she actually wants me, can you believe that?”

“Of course I can. What I can't believe is it took you this long to find her. I hate to rain on your parade, but I need to talk to you about Daryl.”

“What's wrong? Is he OK?”

“He wants to be with Carol.”

“I knew it! He kept telling me he didn't, but I knew it!”

“He didn't want to hurt you so he turned her down and he's keeping his distance, it's getting pretty sad. Can you speak with him?”

“You got it; I never meant for that to happen. I was hurting pretty good there, but I still wanted them to go for it.”

“He won't do it without your blessing, Hun.”

“Thanks for letting me know.”

“Do I get to meet this new woman of yours?” she asked.

“As soon as possible. I want to show her off everywhere I go...she's way too pretty for me,” he laughed.

“Merle, I can't even tell you how happy I am to hear this. You deserve it.”

“Thanks.”

 

**##########################**

 

Daryl was spending the day in front of the TV, dreading a long day off alone. He was lazing around in his boxers feeling useless when Merle called.

“Hey, Merle.”

“Daryl, we have to talk.”

“Huh?”

“Things are different for me here; I met somebody.”

“Already? Who?” Daryl asked, sitting up on the edge of the couch.

“Theodore's sister Jacqui is...she's the one I've been looking for all my life.”

“What?”

“I know how it sounds, and I've only been up here for a while, but this is it. I wanna be with her, and she wants me too.”

“Well....that's great! I'm just surprised,” Daryl said scratching his head.

“You have to go and make a move with Carol, brother. You have to.”

“There really is a woman up there, and you're not just feeding me a bunch of bullshit?” he joked.

“Oh there's a woman all right,” he answered.

“You swear it's OK?”

“Daryl, I want you to be happy. All I ever wanted was for you to be happy.”

“I know. You went through hell for me, that's why I never would have gone after her.”

“We can't live like that anymore, Daryl.”

“I owe you, Merle. I had to watch every single time it happened. Nobody in the world would have done that for me but you.”

“Maybe, but I never did it so you'd owe me. I just did it because I love you, Daryl. I wanted you to be able to grow up and be happy.”

“It's hard to let go of it.”

“I know, but you have someone right there in front of you, and you deserve her, and she's gonna make you really happy. I think this is how we put the past in the past where it belongs.”

“I love you too, Merle.”

“I know, now go and get her.”

 

############################

 

Carol got into the bath and began to drown her sorrows in a nice warm cup of hot chocolate. The painkillers were starting to kick in and ease her sore throat thankfully. It was mid afternoon and cold outside, so she planned to hibernate for the entire day.

All she wanted to do was get cleaned up, and spent the rest of the day on the couch.

She sank her head beneath the water and wet her hair. The water was just the right temperature, scalding hot, and her skin was starting to turn a nice, unnatural shade of red.

She grabbed her mug off the bathroom floor and took a sip; she felt good if not a bit lonely.

Having Daryl, who turned her down, play nurse for her while she acted like a doped up crazy person was an all time low.

She could still see his sexy, squinty eyes looking down at her in her bed but she knew he felt nothing, or he wouldn't have said no.

She lathered up her air in her rose scented shampoo and sang along with the music on her iPod. She didn't feel like staying quiet; she let it go and sang as loud as she could while pouring hot water over her hair to rinse out the shampoo.

 

**I won't regret saying this  
This thing   
That I'm saying   
Is it better than   
Keeping my mouth shut?  
That goes without saying   
Call...break...it...off   
Call...break...my...own heart   
Maybe I would have been   
Something you'd be good at   
Maybe you would have been   
Something I'd be good at   
But now we'll never know   
I won't be sad   
But in case   
I'll go there   
Everyday,   
To make myself feel bad   
There's a chance   
I'll start to wonder   
If this was the thing to do **

  
  


Carol was halfway through the chorus when she was startled by a knock at the door, but she never had visitors who didn't say they were coming.

She listened again and heard a more insistent knock.

“Just a minute!” she hollered.

Carol groaned and hauled herself out of the tub and grabbed her bath sheet to wrap around herself figuring it would Phyllis.

She walked to the door with water dripping down her skin and her hair still soaking wet. She moved the curtain that covered the window in the door just a few inches.

“Daryl?”

“Carol...are you taking a shower?”

“A bath actually...what's up?”

“I really need to talk to you, but I can come back some other time if you want...”

He looked upset, and she thought maybe something bad had happened. She opened the door and figured it was just best to find out what he was talking about.

“Come in, just wait here while I get dressed. Is everything OK? Is Merle alright?”

“He's fine. This is about you.”

“Me?”

She just stood there, holding the towel around her body, looking at him feeling confused. She suddenly forgot all about getting dressed.

“There's a reason I said no before, and it really had nothing to do with you, it had to do with Merle.”

“How?”

“It's such a long story but he liked you a lot, and I didn't want to hurt him.”

“I didn't know that...wait? Did he leave because of me?”

“Yeah, but he's OK now. He met someone already, and he's happy.”

“I'm glad for that; he deserves it. I swear I had no idea he felt that way.

“This goes a long way back for me and Merle, but I felt like I owed him for things that happened when we were little. I did want you, though, I do want you.”

“You do?”

“I wanted you since we met but I just couldn't tell you.”

Carol looked at his face, and she knew it was all true. She wondered what happened when they were little that could possibly affect his decision to stay away from her.

“Can you tell me what happened?” she asked.

“Our dad abused us; he was a really troubled person who drank too much. I'm five years younger than Merle, and I wasn't very good at staying out of our father's way. There were too many times to count when Merle would step in and aggravate the hell out of him until all the anger was directed at him instead of me...he took beatings for me.”

“Oh my god...Daryl, I'm sorry.”

He shrugged and looked at her, and he hoped she understood why he did what he did.

“Merle doesn't have a lot of luck with women, at least not until now I guess. When he talked about you, I could see that he had a chance to be happy if you felt the same so I backed off.”

“You're a good brother, Daryl.”

“Does this all make any sense? I really never meant to hurt you.”

“Daryl, I understand, and I think you did an incredibly selfless thing for him. I think I like you even more now,” she grinned.

“I couldn't like you more than I do right now.”

  


 


	17. Chapter 17

_ **Dealbreaker 17** _

 

“So what do we do now?”

 

She waited for an answer, still standing in a towel. His scruffy hair and squinty eyes made her feel flustered inside. He looked so good she couldn't stop her gaze drifting over his body.

Just as she was starting to wonder what the hell to do or where to go, he was walking toward her, and it felt like slow motion. It was crystal clear what he wanted then, and she wanted it too. Carol had tried to tell herself she didn't want him simply because he didn't want her, or so she thought, but right now she wanted to tear his clothes off.

She licked her lips once as he reached her and touched her shoulders.

“Carol....”

She knew just from his increased respiration and dilated pupils that he was feeling the same. She nodded, and he took her in his arms kissed her.

His lips were strong and dominant she didn't see it coming, but she wanted more.

He backed up for a split second and looked at her.

“I've been thinking of doing that for ages,” he admitted.

“Do it again,” she whispered.

The grin across his lips made something inside her flutter, and his mouth was on hers immediately. His hand on the back of her neck began a rush of blood flow to her face, and she leaned into him.

It was heat, nothing but heat. Holding back for so long had left him almost broken, but now it was on. Daryl didn't know if he'd ever get to touch her and now here she was, damp and wrapped only in a towel. Her tongue slid against his, and she was still holding onto the towel to keep it on, but she was backing up.

He followed since there's no way he was letting go and soon she was against the kitchen counter, and he lifted her onto it.

Carol let out a giggle but then pulled him right back to her, and she was no longer holding onto the towel. Daryl pushed himself between her legs, and the towel slid down her back and opened.

Daryl reached back and pulled his shirt over his head and came right in close again to feel her skin against his.

He pressed his mouth to her neck, and her head leaned back against the cabinets allowing him better access to her throat.

“I wanted you so fucking bad,” he groaned.

“Well, you got me now,” she panted, with her hands attacking his belt.

Her towel was doing nothing to cover her now, and his eyes drank her in, making him drown in his own desire.

She got her hands on his dick and wrapped her fingers around it as he hissed, taking her mouth with his own again. He was painfully hard and throbbing to get inside her, but there were so many things he wanted first.

She continued to jerk him off, and he took her breasts in his hands and moved his attention there.

Daryl kicked off his pants and boxers and started to work his way to her belly with his tongue.

“You wanna go to the bed?” he asked.

“I'm good for now.”

“Good, cause I wanna do this right here.”

His hands took hold of her ass, and soon he was kissing her inner thighs, hips, and belly and making her crazy.

“Daryl....please....”

He grinned and lay his hands on her knees and moved them further apart before ducking down and diving in.

Her fingers ran through his hair, and his tongue was so warm and wet and perfect.

She shuddered and soon leaned back against the cabinets, weak with need.

He did it just right, starting off light and teasing before moving his tongue to the inner folds, making her whine for more.

“Jesus! That's....Mmmmm.”

Nothing intelligible was making it out of her mouth, just panting and whining and blasphemy.

She brought her right foot up onto the edge of the counter, and he ran his arm under it to hold onto her hip. She felt just about to break when the tip of his tongue started moving faster over her clit; it was over.

“Fuck!”

She pulled his mouth tight against her body and rolled her hips toward his face.

Eventually, she lay slumped slightly against the cabinet, holding herself up with her hands on the cool granite.

Daryl pulled her into his arms and carried her to the bedroom with her legs wrapped tightly around him. He lay her on the bed, and she rolled him over to take charge. Her kisses went instantly for his thighs, and he was breathing heavy and hard.

She teased her tongue up the side of his balls, and his dick twitched, making her grin. Soon she had him deep in her mouth and was dragging him to the brink with her wet mouth and hand.

“Carol....I need you...” he begged. “I need you now.”

She crawled over him and kissed his lips as her wet pussy taunted him.

She paused for a moment to look into his eyes, and she felt so many things at once, more than just lust.

“I need you too,” she uttered.

“You got me...as long as you want me,” he answered, and she sank down on his dick and kissed him hard.

She rode it out smooth and swift as he held her breasts then grabbed her ass, his hand were everywhere at once.

She could feel it rising again and leaned forward rubbing her body against his in just the right way. With his dick deep inside her and the friction of rolling her hips, she was getting close. The friction of her clit pressing against his body as she rode him was so delicious.

It dawned on her that they weren't using any protection, but she couldn't stop, it felt too good to stop.

He held her hips with his strong hands and rocked her, matching her rhythm for a bit but he then he needed her under him.

He flipped her in one swift motion underneath him, and her feet came to rest on his ass.

“It's so fucking good...I'm close again...” she sighed.

“What do you need?” he panted.

“Move back just a bit.”

He leaned back and fucked her on his knees, and then her hand crept down to her pussy, and he groaned as he watched. His balls felt tight, and his dick was raging hard as she began with the tips of her fingers on either side of his dick as he thrust in and out of her. Soon she was working her own magic teasing her clit, and he could feel it, her body contracting on his dick. She came hard, and the tight, hot, heavenly pressure was too much to bear.

He had only just enough sense left to pull out and came all over her belly.

He stayed on his hands and knees over her for a long time as he caught his breath and his sweat dripped onto her chest from his forehead.

“Sorry...” he said finally.

“Don't worry about it.”

He looked down at her, and she waited to see what his expression meant.

“I never want to be with anyone else, Carol; you're the one.”

“Come here.”

She smiled and pulled his mouth to hers to kiss him.

She wrapped him in her arms and held him close, and he never felt to loved in all his life.

It was hard not to think of how it could have turned out differently. If Merle hadn't found Jacqui or if Carol had found someone else before he came to his senses but he pushed it out of his mind. He was in her arms, and none of the rest of it mattered.

 

###################################

There's one more chapter but I need to finish it and I'm posting it tonight. Thanks for reading and all the support with this story.

love Teagan. 

 

 

 

 

 


	18. Chapter 18

_ **Dealbreaker 18** _

  _ **~3 months later~**_

“A whole two weeks off and it's my birthday, fuck yes!” Merle exclaimed, standing at the bathroom mirror yet communicating to Jacqui in the kitchen. He was shaving his face and playing music. He still sang along but didn't hide it anymore cause Jacqui said she loved it.

“It's going to be great. I can't wait to meet your brother finally.”

“It'll be a long drive, you almost ready?”

“Yep. Just waiting on you, birthday boy.”

“Not my birthday till tomorrow,” he corrected with a grin.

She appeared behind him, wrapped her arms around his waist and kissed his bare back.

“God, 41! Where does the time go?”

“No idea but you look fine as hell so don't worry about age. You ready for your present? I'm dying to see what you think, and I can't wait till tomorrow.”

“I suppose so,” he teased, turning in her arms and kissing her soft and slow.

Life was one sweet day after another with her, and he was still trying to believe it. T ended up being fine with it as long as Merle promised to be good to her which he obviously did. After three months of domestic bliss, they were heading back to Regina to see Daryl and Carol. After a lot of thought and discussion with Daryl, he decided to stay with Jacqui and Daryl understood. Between Daryl and Carol, Auto Graveyard was running like a well-oiled machine.

Jacqui handed him a red envelope, and he insisted she didn't have to bother with anything for his birthday.

“Hush your mouth and open it.”

Merle opened the card, and it took him a long, silent pause to comprehend it.

“This is too much.”

“No, it isn't.”

He looked at her skeptically.

“Merle, I've been sitting on Sam's life insurance money for three years, and after all the traveling I've done I know how to book cheap tickets.”

“But-”

“I really want to give you this, please let me.”

Merle couldn't think of a way to say no, she had her mind set and if he argued she'd get upset. It was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for him, but he didn't want her spending her money on him.

“Thank you, honey.”

She smiled and wrapped him up in her arms.

“You're welcome, and don't be scared of flying cause I'll be with you to hold your hand. You're going to love Scotland.”

“I love you, Jacqui. Thank you for this.”

“I love you too. I guess we better get going soon.

“Yeah, we better. Just know I'm going crazy for your birthday too now,” he asserted

“If you must,” she laughed.

“I can't wait to see Daryl again; it's been forever.”

 

They hit the road bright and early to get back to Regina in time to have supper with Daryl and Carol at Daryl's place and get acquainted.

 

#########################

 

“They're here!”

Daryl had been waiting by the window like an excited puppy for ages, and Carol found it adorable.

Merle came through the door groaning and carrying his and Jacqui's bags.

“Hey, you two!” he bellowed. “Someone better have a cold beer around this place; I'm haggard.”

“Hey, man, get in here!” Daryl walked down the steps to the door and hugged his brother. Three months had gone by so slowly, and he missed him like crazy. When he finally let go Merle introduced Jacqui who was standing quietly behind him.

“This is Jacqui, my honey,” he grinned, leaning down to kiss her cheek. “This is my brother Daryl and his honey Carol.”

“We missed you so much, Merle,” Carol added.

“Well, gimme a hug then.”

She smiled and hugged him and then Jacqui.

“I've been cooking all day, and I hope you're both hungry.”

“We are pretty hungry, Thanks, Carol,” Jacqui answered.

“Come on in, and I'll get you a glass of wine.”

“Sounds good to me.”

The women retired to the kitchen to chat and get to know each other.

“Merle hasn't stopped raving about you to Daryl since you met,” Carol began, stirring a pot on the stove.

“He's a sweetheart. I never thought I'd find anyone like him after losing my husband.”

“He's so happy, and you look so good together.”

 

They ate supper together, and it was like old friends hanging out, everyone got along and had a laugh. Carol had cooked a full Ukrainian dinner with cabbage rolls, perogies and deer sausage from Daryl's kill in the fall.

Merle and Daryl helped to clean up after, and Merle took Jacqui down to the basement where nothing had been changed since he left. They were exhausted after the long drive and just wanted to rest.

Daryl would go down occasionally to play Merle's music and shoot some pool on his pool table since he missed him, but everything was left the same. Their house was big enough that he didn't need the space anyway.

“Your brother is so nice, and Carol is a sweetheart. I was nervous to meet them, but it went well, hey?”

“It went perfectly. Man, I'm tired,” he groaned.

“Come get in bed then,” she grinned, crawling under the covers of his old bed.

Merle thought of all the time he'd spent down in the basement alone and wishing he had someone. Here she was now, the someone he wanted.

He crawled in beside her and pulled her close.

“I don't know if I have the energy for anything fun,” he yawned.

“Tomorrow night then,” she agreed.

He leaned over and turned off the lamp and sighed, everything was perfect.

“So where can I get this Xanax stuff for flying?” he asked.

“From a doctor, but there's always scotch too,” she laughed.

“You're a dream come true, do you know that?”

“Yes, cause you say it every night.”

“You want a new line? Is it getting old?” he asked, kissing her neck.

“No, I love it. I want to hear it every night for the rest of my life.”

“I love you too much,” he said, rolling over her.

“Thought you were too tired?”

“Nah, I can sleep when I'm dead,” he whispered, licking her ear softly. “You too tired?”

“Hell no! Give it to me,” she squealed.

 

**###########################**

 

“How cute are they together?” Carol noted, getting into her nighty.

“They look really happy. I've never seen him like that; he's different already.”

“Yep, three months of being with her has made him a whole new man, a happier one anyway.”

“I can't believe she'd getting him on a plane; he's been terrified of the idea of flying since we were kids.”

“I think he'd go with her anywhere,” Carol laughed.

Daryl turned out the light, and they got into bed. Carol curled up in his arms and kissed him goodnight.

“I've been thinking,” Daryl began.

“Uh oh,” she teased.

“How long are people supposed to be together before they get married, is three months too soon?”

“I don't think there's any rule on that, it's up to whoever's getting married,” she answered, awaiting an explanation.

“I just mean if a guy asks too soon then she might say no, right?”

“Is Merle proposing to Jacqui or something?”

“No....I'm proposing to you, but I'm doing a terrible job of it.”

Carol froze and tried to see his face in the dark.

“What?”

“Too fast, huh?”

“No.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

He got out of bed and turned on the light and frowned at her.

“Lemme start over, that was terrible.”

She grinned as he crawled onto the bed and took her hands in his.

“Carol, you're the most amazing person I ever met, and I want to be with you forever....this isn't very good either, is it? I should have put more thought into this.”

“I'll marry you, Daryl.”

It was inarticulate and sloppy but heartfelt and true, that's all that mattered.

He sighed in relief but still wished he done it better. She still pulled him over her though and kissed him like he'd said everything right.

Making love to Carol was better every time it happened. The way he figured it, the waiting, the past, the pain and all the missteps brought him to where he was, and it's right where he was supposed to be.

 

**############################**

 

Merle and Daryl pulled up outside Louie's the next night in Merle's Challenger feeling glad to be back in their old haunt.

Merle racked up the balls on the table, and Daryl broke them. Back at Louie's everything was the same, but for them, everything was so different.

“Scotland, huh?”

“Yep, I'm gonna be a giant fucking baby all the damn way though I can feel it already,” Merle laughed.

“I think she'll take care of you. You got a really great woman there,” Daryl noted, taking a shot.

“She really is, I knew right away that she was it for me. I never thought I'd find someone. I was in such a low place the last time I was here.”

“All in the past, man. Nothing but good things in your future now.”

“I'm not losing her for anything. I'm hoping someday we can have a family and get hitched like you and Carol.”

“I asked after three months, and she said yes, ask her.”

“You think?” Merle asked.

“I saw how she looks at you, just go for it.”

“Maybe I will then, she did say she wanted to get married again someday. She was even looking at rings on this online jewelry site.”

“Dude, she's hinting.”

“Yeah?”

“Definitely, ask her.”

“I still can't believe how everything changed so fast.”

“It was our time, I think,” Daryl laughed.

“We sure did go through some shit, didn't we?” Merle said, sinking the eight ball.

“Yeah, but we put it in the past just like you said we would.”

“Very true, little brother, very true.”

They played a few more games but very soon just wanted to get back to Jacqui and Carol.

The rest of the visit was great, and when Jacqui and Merle went to Scotland a month later, he proposed in the Scotish Highlands and she said yes.

Daryl finally felt free of the past and only looked forward to more happiness for himself and the brother who saved him so many times.

 

############################

_That's all folks!_

_If this seems like an abrupt ending that's because the main plot of this story was Daryl and Merle overcoming their past and finding partners to spend their lives with and not the relationships themselves. I could have gone on longer, but without a conflict, it would be a little dry, and these boys don't deserve anymore conflict. I'm working on a new story (Caryl only, no Merle this time) but I'm going to Calgary FanExpo with my daughter from the 28th-1 st, and I'll start posting not long after I get back. Thanks for reading and for all the input. _

_Love you all so much, Teagan xoxoxo_

 


End file.
